an unsocial socialist-第15章

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over　ears；　shuddered　chillily　in　fur　tippets　whilst　they　loaded
their　memories　with　the　statements　of　writers　on　moral　science；
or；　like　men　who　swim　upon　corks；　reasoned　out　mathematical
problems　upon　postulates。　Whence　it　sometimes　happened　that　the
more　reasonable　a　student　was　in　mathematics；　the　more
unreasonable　she　was　in　the　affairs　of　real　life；　concerning
which　few　trustworthy　postulates　have　yet　been　ascertained。

Agatha；　not　studious；　and　apt　to　shiver　in　winter；　began　to　break
Rule　No。　17　with　increasing　frequency。　Rule　No。　17　forbade　the
students　to　enter　the　kitchen；　or　in　any　way　to　disturb　the
servants　in　the　discharge　of　their　duties。　Agatha　broke　it
because　she　was　fond　of　making　toffee；　of　eating　it；　of　a　good
fire；　of　doing　any　forbidden　thing；　and　of　the　admiration　with
which　the　servants　listened　to　her　ventriloquial　and　musical
feats。　Gertrude　accompanied　her　because　she　too　liked　toffee；　and
because　she　plumed　herself　on　her　condescension　to　her　inferiors。
Jane　went　because　her　two　friends　went；　and　the　spirit　of
adventure；　the　force　of　example；　and　the　love　of　toffee　often
brought　more　volunteers　to　these　expeditions　than　Agatha　thought
it　safe　to　enlist。　One　evening　Miss　Wilson；　going　downstairs
alone　to　her　private　wine　cellar；　was　arrested　near　the　kitchen
by　sounds　of　revelry；　and；　stopping　to　listen；　overheard　the
castanet　dance　（which　reminded　her　of　the　emphasis　with　which
Agatha　had　snapped　her　fingers　at　Mrs。　Miller）；　the　bee　on　the
window　pane；　〃Robin　Adair〃　（encored　by　the　servants）；　and　an
imitation　of　herself　in　the　act　of　appealing　to　Jane　Carpenter's
better　nature　to　induce　her　to　study　for　the　Cambridge　Local。　She
waited　until　the　cold　and　her　fear　of　being　discovered　spying
forced　her　to　creep　upstairs；　ashamed　of　having　enjoyed　a　silly
entertainment；　and　of　conniving　at　a　breach　of　the　rules　rather
than　face　a　fresh　quarrel　with　Agatha。

There　was　one　particular　in　which　matters　between　Agatha　and　the
college　discipline　did　not　go　on　exactly　as　before。　Although　she
had　formerly　supplied　a　disproportionately　large　number　of　the
confessions　in　the　fault　book；　the　entry　which　had　nearly　led　to
her　expulsion　was　the　last　she　ever　made　in　it。　Not　that　her
conduct　was　betterit　was　rather　the　reverse。　Miss　Wilson　never
mentioned　the　matter；　the　fault　book　being　sacred　from　all
allusion　on　her　part。　But　she　saw　that　though　Agatha　would　not
confess　her　own　sins；　she　still　assisted　others　to　unburden　their
consciences。　The　witticisms　with　which　Jane　unsuspectingly
enlivened　the　pages　of　the　Recording　Angel　were　conclusive　on
this　point。

Smilash　had　now　adopted　a　profession。　In　the　last　days　of　autumn
he　had　whitewashed　the　chalet；　painted　the　doors；　windows；　and
veranda；　repaired　the　roof　and　interior；　and　improved　the　place
so　much　that　the　landlord　had　warned　him　that　the　rent　would　be
raised　at　the　expiration　of　his　twelvemonth's　tenancy；　remarking
that　a　tenant　could　not　reasonably　expect　to　have　a　pretty；
rain…tight　dwelling…house　for　the　same　money　as　a　hardly
habitable　ruin。　Smilash　had　immediately　promised　to　dilapidate　it
to　its　former　state　at　the　end　of　the　year。　He　had　put　up　a　board
at　the　gate　with　an　inscription　copied　from　some　printed　cards
which　he　presented　to　persons　who　happened　to　converse　with　him。
_______________________________________________________　　　　　　　　　　

　　　　JEFFERSON　SMILASH

PAINTER；　DECORATOR；　GLAZIER；　PLUMBER　&　GARDENER。　Pianofortes
tuned。　Domestic　engineering　in　all　its　Branches。　Families　waited
upon　at　table　or　otherwise。

CHAMOUNIX　VILLA；　LYVERN。　（N。B。　Advice　Gratis。　No　Reasonable　offer
refused。）　_______________________________________________________


The　business　thus　announced；　comprehensive　as　it　was；　did　not
flourish。　When　asked　by　the　curious　for　testimony　to　his
competence　and　respectability；　he　recklessly　referred　them　to
Fairholme；　to　Josephs；　and　in　particular　to　Miss　Wilson；　who；　he
said；　had　known　him　from　his　earliest　childhood。　Fairholme；　glad
of　an　opportunity　to　show　that　he　was　no　mealy　mouthed　parson；
declared；　when　applied　to；　that　Smilash　was　the　greatest　rogue　in
the　country。　Josephs；　partly　from　benevolence；　and　partly　from　a
vague　fear　that　Smilash　might　at　any　moment　take　an　action
against　him　for　defamation　of　character；　said　he　had　no　doubt
that　he　was　a　very　cheap　workman；　and　that　it　would　be　a　charity
to　give　him　some　little　job　to　encourage　him。　Miss　Wilson
confirmed　Fairholme's　account；　and　the　church　organist；　who　had
tuned　all　the　pianofortes　in　the　neighborhood　once　a　year　for
nearly　a　quarter　of　a　century；　denounced　the　newcomer　as　Jack　of
all　trades　and　master　of　none。　Hereupon　the　radicals　of　Lyvern；　a
small　and　disreputable　party；　began　to　assert　that　there　was　no
harm　in　the　man；　and　that　the　parsons　and　Miss　Wilson；　who　lived
in　a　fine　house　and　did　nothing　but　take　in　the　daughters　of　rich
swells　as　boarders；　might　employ　their　leisure　better　than　in
taking　the　bread　out　of　a　poor　work　man's　mouth。　But　as　none　of
this　faction　needed　the　services　of　a　domestic　engineer；　he　was
none　the　richer　for　their　support；　and　the　only　patron　he
obtained　was　a　housemaid　who　was　leaving　her　situation　at　a
country　house　in　the　vicinity；　and　wanted　her　box　repaired；　the
lid　having　fallen　off。　Smilash　demanded　half…a…crown　for　the　job；
but　on　her　demurring；　immediately　apologized　and　came　down　to　a
shilling。　For　this　sum　he　repainted　the　box；　traced　her　initials
on　it；　and　affixed　new　hinges；　a　Bramah　lock；　and　brass　handles；
at　a　cost　to　himself　of　ten　shillings　and　several　hours'　labor。
The　housemaid　found　fault　with　the　color　of　the　paint；　made　him
take　off　the　handles；　which；　she　said；　reminded　her　of　a　coffin；
complained　that　a　lock　with　such　a　small　key　couldn't　be　strong
enough　for　a　large　box；　but　admitted　that　it　was　all　her　own
fault　for　not　employing　a　proper　man。　It　got　about　that　he　had
made　a　poor　job　of　the　box；　and　as　he；　when　taxed　with　this；
emphatically　confirmed　it；　he　got　no　other　commission；　and　his
signboard　served　thenceforth　only　for　the　amusement　of　pedestrian
tourists　and　of　shepherd　boys　with　a　taste　for　stone　throwing。

One　night　a　great　storm　blew　over　Lyvern；　and　those　young　ladies
at　Alton　College　who　were　afraid　of　lightning；　said　their　prayers
with　some　earnestness。　At　half…past　twelve　the　rain；　wind；　and
thunder　made　such　a　din　that　Agatha　and　Gertrude　wrapped
themselves　in　shawls；　stole　downstairs　to　the　window　on　the
landing　outside　Miss　Wilson's　study；　and　stood　watching　the
flashes　give　vivid　glimpses　of　the　landscape；　and　discussing　in
whispers　whether　it　was　dangerous　to　stand　near　a　window；　and
whether　brass　stair…rods　could　attract　lightning。　Agatha；　as
serious　and　friendly　with　a　single　companion　as　she　was
mischievous　and　satirical　before　a　larger　audience；　enjoyed　the
scene　quietly。　The　lightning　did　not　terrify　her；　for　she　knew
little　of　the　value　of　life；　and　fancied　much　concerning　the
heroism　of　being　indifferent　to　it。　The　tremors　which　the　more
startling　flashes　caused　her；　only　made　her　more　conscious　of　her
own　courage　and　its　contrast　with　the　uneasiness　of　Gertrude；　who
at　last；　shrinking　from　a　forked　zigzag　of　blue　flame；　said：

〃Let　us　go　back　to　bed；　Agatha。　I　feel　sure　that　we　are　not　safe
here。〃

〃Quite　as　safe　as　in　bed；　where　we　cannot　see　anything。　How　the
house　shakes！　I　believe　the　rain　will　batter　in　the　windows
before〃

〃Hush；〃　whispered　Gertrude；　catching　her　arm　in　terror。　〃What　was
that？〃

〃What？〃

〃I　am　sure　I　heard　the　bellthe　gate　bell。　Oh；　do　let　us　go　back
to　bed。〃

〃Nonsense！　Who　would　be　out　on　such　a　night　as　this？　Perhaps　the
wind　rang　it。〃

They　waited　for　a　few　moments；　Gertrude　trembling；　and　Agatha
feeling；　as　she　listened　in　the　darkness；　a　sensation　familiar　to
persons　who　are　afraid　of　ghosts。　Presently　a　veiled　clangor
mingled　with　the　wind。　A　few　sharp　and　urgent　snatches　of　it　came
unmistakably　from　the　bell　at　the　gate　of　the　college　grounds。　It
was　a　loud　bell；　used　to　summon　a　servant　from　the　college　to
open　the　gates；　for　though　there　was　a　porter's　lodge；　it　was
uninhabited。

〃Who　on　earth　can　it　be？〃　said　Agatha。　〃Can't　they　find　the
wicket；　the　idiots？〃

〃Oh；　I　hope　not！　Do　come　upstairs；　Agatha。〃

〃No；　I　won't。　Go　you；　if　you　like。〃　But　Gertrude　was　afraid　to　go
alone。　〃I　think　I　had　better　waken　Miss　Wilson；　and　tell　her；〃
continued　Agatha。　〃It　seems　awful　to　shut　anybody　out　on　such　a
night　as　this。〃

〃But　we　don't　know　who　it　is。〃

〃Well；　I　suppose　you　are　not　afraid　of　them；　in　any　case；〃　said
Agatha；　knowing　the　contrary；　but　recognizing　the　convenience　of
shaming　Gertrude　into　silence。

They　listened　again。　The　storm　was　now　very　boisterous；　and　they
could　not　hear　the　bell。　Suddenly　there　was　a　loud　knocking　at
the　house　door。　Gertrude　screamed；　and　her　cry　was　echoed　from
the　rooms　above；　where　several　girls　had　heard　the　knocking　also；
and　had　been　driven　by　it　into　the　state　of　mind　which
accompanies　the　climax　of　a　nightmare。　Then　a　candle　flickered　on
the　stairs；　and　Miss　Wilson's　voice；　reassuringly　firm；　was
heard。

〃Who　is　that？〃

〃It　is　I；　Miss　Wilson；　and　Gertrude。　We　have　been　watching　the
storm；　and　there　is　some　one　knocking　at　the〃　A　tremendous
battery　with　the　knocker；　followed　by　a　sound；　confused　by　the
gale；　as　of　a　man　shouting；　interrupted　her。

〃They　had　better　not　open　the　door；〃　said　Miss　Wilson；　in　some
alarm。　〃You　are　very　imprudent；　Agatha；　to　stand　here。　You　will
catch　your　death　ofDear　me！　What　can　be　the　matter？　She　hurried
down；　followed　by　Agatha；　Gertrude；　and　some　of　the　braver
students；　to　the　hall；　where　they　found　a　few　shivering　servants
watching　the　housekeeper；　who　was　at　the　keyhole　of　the　house
door；　querulously　asking　who　was　there。　She　was　evidently　not
heard　by　those　without；　for　the　knocking　recommenced　whilst　she
was　speaking；　and　she　recoiled　as　if　she　had　received　a　blow　on
the　mouth。　Miss　Wilson　then　rattled　the　chain　to　attract
attention；　and　demanded　again　who　was　there。

〃Let　us　in；〃　was　returned　in　a　hollow　shout　through　the　keyhole。
〃There　is　a　dying　woman　and　three　children　here。　Open　the　door。〃

Miss　Wilson　lost　her　presence　of　mind。　To　gain　time；　she　replied；
〃II　can't　hear　you。　What　do　you　say？〃

〃Damnation！〃　said　the　voice；　speaking　this　time　to　some　one
outside。　〃They　can't　hear。〃　And　the　knocking　recommenced　with
increased　urgency。　Agatha；　excited；　caught　Miss　Wilson's　dressing
gown；　and　repeated　to　her　what　the　voice　had　said。　Miss　Wilson
had　heard　distinctly　enough；　and　she　felt；　without　knowing
clearly　why；　that　the　door　must　be　opened；　but　she　was　almost
over…mastered　by　a　vague　dread　of　what　was　to　follow。　She　began
to　undo　the　chain；　and　Agatha　helped　with　the　bolts。　Two　of　the
servants　exclaimed　that　they　were　all　about　to　be　murdered　in
their　beds；　and　ran　away。　A　few　of　the　students　seemed　inclined
to　follow　their　example。　At　last　the　door；　loosed；　was　blown　wide
open；　flinging　Miss　Wilson　and　Agatha　back；　and　admitting　a
whirlwind　that　tore　round　the　hall；　snatched　at　the　women's
draperies；　and　blew　out　the　lights。　Agatha；　by　a　hash　of
lightning；　saw　for　an　i