anecdotes of the late samuel johnson-第6章
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〃there are four or five hundred faults instead of four or five； but you do not consider that it would take me up three whole months' labour； and when the time was expired the work would not be done。〃 When the booksellers set him about it； however； some years after； he went cheerfully to the business； said he was well paid； and that they deserved to have it done carefully。 His reply to the person who complimented him on its coming out first； mentioning the ill success of the French in a similar attempt； is well known； and； I trust； has been often recorded。 〃Why； what would you expect； dear sir；〃 said he； 〃from fellows that eat frogs？〃 I have； however； often thought Dr。 Johnson more free than prudent in professing so loudly his little skill in the Greek language； for though he considered it as a proof of a narrow mind to be too careful of literary reputation； yet no man could be more enraged than he if an enemy； taking advantage of this confession； twitted him with his ignorance； and I remember when the King of Denmark was in England one of his noblemen was brought by Mr。 Colman to see Dr。 Johnson at our country house； and having heard； he said； that he was not famous for Greek literature； attacked him on the weak side； politely adding that he chose that conversation on purpose to favour himself。 Our Doctor； however； displayed so copious； so compendious a knowledge of authors； books； and every branch of learning in that language； that the gentleman appeared astonished。 When he was gone home； says Johnson； 〃Now； for all this triumph I may thank Thrale's Xenophon here； as I think； excepting that ONE； I have not looked in a Greek book these ten years； but see what haste my dear friends were all in；〃 continued he； 〃to tell this poor innocent foreigner that I know nothing of Greek！ Oh； no； he knows nothing of Greek！〃 with a loud burst of laughing。
When Davies printed the 〃Fugitive Pieces〃 without his knowledge or consent； 〃How；〃 said I； 〃would Pope have raved； had he been served so！〃 〃We should never；〃 replied he； 〃have heard the last on't； to be sure； but then Pope was a narrow man。 I will； however；〃 added he； 〃storm and bluster MYSELF a little this time；〃 so went to London in all the wrath he could muster up。 At his return I asked how the affair ended。 〃Why；〃 said he； 〃I was a fierce fellow； and pretended to be very angry； and Thomas was a good…natured fellow； and pretended to be very sorry； so THERE the matter ended。 I believe the dog loves me dearly。 Mr。 Thrale；〃 turning to my husband； 〃what shall you and I do that is good for Tom Davies？ We will do something for him； to be sure。〃
Of Pope as a writer he had the highest opinion； and once when a lady at our house talked of his preface to Shakespeare as superior to Pope's； 〃I fear not； madam；〃 said he； 〃the little fellow has done wonders。〃 His superior reverence of Dryden； notwithstanding； still appeared in his talk as in his writings； and when some one mentioned the ridicule thrown on him in the 'Rehearsal；' as having hurt his general character as an author； 〃On the contrary；〃 says Mr。 Johnson； 〃the greatness of Dryden's reputation is now the only principle of vitality which keeps the Duke of Buckingham's play from putrefaction。〃
It was not very easy； however； for people not quite intimate with Dr。 Johnson to get exactly his opinion of a writer's merit； as he would now and then divert himself by confounding those who thought themselves obliged to say to…morrow what he had said yesterday； and even Garrick； who ought to have been better acquainted with his tricks； professed himself mortified that one time when he was extolling Dryden in a rapture that I suppose disgusted his friend； Mr。 Johnson suddenly challenged him to produce twenty lines in a series that would not disgrace the poet and his admirer。 Garrick produced a passage that he had once heard the Doctor commend； in which he NOW found； if I remember rightly； sixteen faults； and made Garrick look silly at his own table。 When I told Mr。 Johnson the story； 〃Why； what a monkey was David now；〃 says he； 〃to tell of his own disgrace！〃 And in the course of that hour's chat he told me how he used to tease Garrick by commendations of the tomb…scene in Congreve's 'Mourning Bride；' protesting； that Shakespeare had in the same line of excellence nothing as good。 〃All which is strictly TRUE；〃 said he； 〃but that is no reason for supposing Congreve is to stand in competition with Shakespeare： these fellows know not how to blame； nor how to commend。〃 I forced him one day； in a similar humour； to prefer Young's description of 〃Night〃 to the so much admired ones of Dryden and Shakespeare； as more forcible and more general。 Every reader is not either a lover or a tyrant； but every reader is interested when he hears that
〃Creation sleeps； 'tis as the general pulse Of life stood still； and nature made a pause； An awful pauseprophetic of its end。〃
〃This；〃 said he； 〃is true； but remember that； taking the compositions of Young in general； they are but like bright stepping…stones over a miry road。 Young froths and foams； and bubbles sometimes very vigorously； but we must not compare the noise made by your tea…kettle here with the roaring of the ocean。〃
Somebody was praising Corneille one day in opposition to Shakespeare。 〃Corneille is to Shakespeare；〃 replied Mr。 Johnson； 〃as a clipped hedge is to a forest。〃 When we talked of Steele's Essays； 〃They are too thin；〃 says our critic； 〃for an Englishman's taste： mere superficial observations on life and manners； without erudition enough to make them keep； like the light French wines； which turn sour with standing awhile for want of BODY； as we call it。〃
Of a much…admired poem； when extolled as beautiful； he replied； 〃That it had indeed the beauty of a bubble。 The colours are gay；〃 said he； 〃but the substance slight。〃 Of James Harris's Dedication to his 〃Hermes；〃 I have heard him observe that； though but fourteen lines long； there were six grammatical faults in it。 A friend was praising the style of Dr。 Swift； Mr。 Johnson did not find himself in the humour to agree with him： the critic was driven from one of his performances to the other。 At length； 〃You MUST allow me；〃 said the gentleman； 〃that there are STRONG FACTS in the account of 'The Four Last Years of Queen Anne。'〃 〃Yes； surely； sir；〃 replies Johnson； 〃and so there are in the Ordinary of Newgate's account。〃 This was like the story which Mr。 Murphy tells； and Johnson always acknowledged： how Mr。 Rose of Hammersmith； contending for the preference of Scotch writers over the English； after having set up his authors like ninepins； while the Doctor kept bowling them down again； at last； to make sure of victory； he named Ferguson upon 〃Civil Society；〃 and praised the book for being written in a NEW manner。 〃I do not；〃 says Johnson； 〃perceive the value of this new manner； it is only like Buckinger； who had no hands； and so wrote with his feet。〃 Of a modern Martial； when it came out： 〃There are in these verses；〃 says Dr。 Johnson； 〃too much folly for madness； I think； and too much madness for folly。〃 If； however； Mr。 Johnson lamented that the nearer he approached to his own times； the more enemies he should make； by telling biographical truths in his 〃Lives of the Later Poets；〃 what may I not apprehend； who； if I relate anecdotes of Mr。 Johnson； am obliged to repeat expressions of severity； and sentences of contempt？ Let me at least soften them a little by saying that he did not hate the persons he treated with roughness； or despise them whom he drove from him by apparent scorn。 He really loved and respected many whom he would not suffer to love him。 And when he related to me a short dialogue that passed between himself and a writer of the first eminence in the world； when he was in Scotland； I was shocked to think how he must have disgusted him。 〃Dr。 asked me；〃 said he； 〃why I did not join in their public worship when among them？ for；〃 said he； 〃I went to your churches often when in England。〃 〃So；〃 replied Johnson； 〃I have read that the Siamese sent ambassadors to Louis Quatorze； but I never heard that the King of France thought it worth his while to send ambassadors from his court to that of SIAM。〃 He was no gentler with myself； or those for whom I had the greatest regard。 When I one day lamented the loss of a first cousin killed in America； 〃Prithee； my dear；〃 said he； 〃have done with canting。 How would the world be worse for it； I may ask； if all your relations were at once spitted like larks； and roasted for Presto's supper？〃 Presto was the dog that lay under the table while we talked。 When we went into Wales together； and spent some time at Sir Robert Cotton's； at Lleweny； one day at dinner I meant to please Mr。 Johnson particularly with a dish of very young peas。 〃Are not they charming？〃 said I to him； while he was eating them。 〃Perhaps；〃 said he； 〃they would be soto a PIG。〃 I only instance these replies； to excuse my mentioning those he made to others。
When a well…known author published his poems in the year 1777： 〃Such a one's verses are come out；〃 said I。 〃Yes；〃 replied Johnson； 〃and this frost has struck them in again。 Here are some lines I have written to ridicule them； but remember that I love the fellow dearly now； for all I laugh at him：
〃'Wheresoe'er I turn my view； All is strange； yet nothing new； Endless labour all along； Endless labour to be wrong； Phrase that Time has flung away； Uncouth words in disarray； Tricked in antique ruff and bonnet； Ode； and elegy； and sonnet。'〃
When he parodied the verses of another eminent writer； it was done with more provocation； I believe； and with some merry malice。 A serious translation of the same lines； which I think are from Euripides； may be found in Burney's 〃History of Music。〃 Here are the burlesque ones：
〃Err shall they not； who resolute explore Time's gloomy backward with judicious eyes； And scanning right the practices of yore； Shall deem our hoar progenitors unwise。
〃They to the dome where smoke with curling play Announced the dinner to the regions round； Summoned the singer blithe； and harper gay； And aided wine with dulcet streaming sound。
〃The better use of notes； or sweet or shrill； By quivering string； or modulated wind； Trumpet or lyreto their harsh bosoms chill； Admission ne'er had sought； or could not find。
〃Oh！ send them to the sullen mansions dun； Her baleful eyes where Sorrow rolls around； Where gloom…enamoured Mischief loves to dwell； And Murder； all blood…boltered； schemes the wound。
〃When cates luxuriant pile the spacious dish； And purple nectar glads the festive hour； The guest； without a want； without a wish； Can yield no room to Music's soothing power。〃
Some of the old legendary stories put in verse by modern writers provoked him to caricature them thus one day at Streatham； but they are already well known； I am sure。
〃The tender infant； meek and mild； Fell down upon the stone； The nurse took up the squealing child； But still the child squealed on。〃
A famous ballad a
