vanity fair(名利场)-第33章

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so　soon？　　She　was　one　of　those　sickly　women　that
might　have　lasted　these　ten　yearsRebecca　thought　to
herself；　in　all　the　woes　of　repentanceand　I　might　have
been　my　lady！　　I　might　have　led　that　old　man　whither　I
would。　　I　might　have　thanked　Mrs。　Bute　for　her
patronage；　and　Mr。　Pitt　for　his　insufferable　condescension。　　I
would　have　had　the　town…house　newly　furnished　and
decorated。　　I　would　have　had　the　handsomest　carriage　in
London；　and　a　box　at　the　opera；　and　I　would　have
been　presented　next　season。　　All　this　might　have　been；
and　nownow　all　was　doubt　and　mystery。
　　
But　Rebecca　was　a　young　lady　of　too　much　resolution
and　energy　of　character　to　permit　herself　much　useless
and　unseemly　sorrow　for　the　irrevocable　past；　so；　having
devoted　only　the　proper　portion　of　regret　to　it；　she　wisely
turned　her　whole　attention　towards　the　future；　which
was　now　vastly　more　important　to　her。　　And　she
surveyed　her　position；　and　its　hopes；　doubts；　and　chances。
　　
In　the　first　place；　she　was　MARRIEDthat　was　a　great
fact。　　Sir　Pitt　knew　it。　　She　was　not　so　much　surprised　into
the　avowal；　as　induced　to　make　it　by　a　sudden　calculation。
It　must　have　come　some　day：　and　why　not　now
as　at　a　later　period？　He　who　would　have　married　her
himself　must　at　least　be　silent　with　regard　to　her　marriage。
How　Miss　Crawley　would　bear　the　newswas　the　great
question。　　Misgivings　Rebecca　had；　but　she　remembered
all　Miss　Crawley　had　said；　the　old　lady's　avowed
contempt　for　birth；　her　daring　liberal　opinions；　her
general　romantic　propensities；　her　almost　doting　attachment
to　her　nephew；　and　her　repeatedly　expressed　fondness　for
Rebecca　herself。　　She　is　so　fond　of　him；　Rebecca　thought；
that　she　will　forgive　him　anything：　she　is　so　used　to　me
that　I　don't　think　she　could　be　comfortable　without
me：　when　the　eclaircissement　comes　there　will　be　a
scene；　and　hysterics；　and　a　great　quarrel；　and　then　a
great　reconciliation。　　At　all　events；　what　use　was　there
in　delaying？　the　die　was　thrown；　and　now　or　to…morrow
the　issue　must　be　the　same。　　And　so；　resolved　that　Miss
Crawley　should　have　the　news；　the　young　person
debated　in　her　mind　as　to　the　best　means　of　conveying　it
to　her；　and　whether　she　should　face　the　storm　that　must
come；　or　fly　and　avoid　it　until　its　first　fury　was　blown
over。　　In　this　state　of　meditation　she　wrote　the　following
letter：
Dearest　Friend；
The　great　crisis　which　we　have　debated
about　so　often　is　COME。　　Half　of　my　secret　is　known；　and
I　have　thought　and　thought；　until　I　am　quite　sure　that
now　is　the　time　to　reveal　THE　WHOLE　OF　THE　MYSTERY。　　Sir
Pitt　came　to　me　this　morning；　and　madewhat　do　you
think？A　DECLARATION　IN　FORM。　　Think　of　that！　　Poor
little　me。　　I　might　have　been　Lady　Crawley。　　How　pleased
Mrs。　Bute　would　have　been：　and　ma　tante　if　I　had　taken
precedence　of　her！　I　might　have　been　somebody's
mamma；　instead　ofO；　I　tremble；　I　tremble；　when　I
think　how　soon　we　must　tell　all！
　　
Sir　Pitt　knows　I　am　married；　and　not　knowing　to
whom；　is　not　very　much　displeased　as　yet。　　Ma　tante　is
ACTUALLY　ANGRY　that　I　should　have　refused　him。　　But　she
is　all　kindness　and　graciousness。　　She　condescends　to　say
I　would　have　made　him　a　good　wife；　and　vows　that
she　will　be　a　mother　to　your　little　Rebecca。　　She　will　be
shaken　when　she　first　hears　the　news。　　But　need　we　fear
anything　beyond　a　momentary　anger？　　I　think　not：　I　AM
SURE　not。　　She　dotes　upon　you　so　（you　naughty；　good…for…
nothing　man）；　that　she　would　pardon　you　ANYTHING：
and；　indeed；　I　believe；　the　next　place　in　her　heart　is
mine：　and　that　she　would　be　miserable　without　me。
Dearest！　something　TELLS　ME　we　shall　conquer。　　You　shall
leave　that　odious　regiment：　quit　gaming；　racing；　and　BE
A　GOOD　BOY；　and　we　shall　all　live　in　Park　Lane；　and　ma
tante　shall　leave　us　all　her　money。
　　
I　shall　try　and　walk　to…morrow　at　3　in　the　usual　place。
If　Miss　B。　accompanies　me；　you　must　come　to　dinner；
and　bring　an　answer；　and　put　it　in　the　third　volume　of
Porteus's　Sermons。　　But；　at　all　events；　come　to　your　own
R。
To　Miss　Eliza　Styles；
At　Mr。　Barnet's；　Saddler；　Knightsbridge。
And　I　trust　there　is　no　reader　of　this　little　story　who
has　not　discernment　enough　to　perceive　that　the　Miss
Eliza　Styles　（an　old　schoolfellow；　Rebecca　said；　with
whom　she　had　resumed　an　active　correspondence　of　late；
and　who　used　to　fetch　these　letters　from　the　saddler's）；
wore　brass　spurs；　and　large　curling　mustachios；　and　was
indeed　no　other　than　Captain　Rawdon　Crawley。

CHAPTER　XVI
The　Letter　on　the　Pincushion
How　they　were　married　is　not　of　the　slightest
consequence　to　anybody。　　What　is　to　hinder　a　Captain　who
is　a　major；　and　a　young　lady　who　is　of　age；　from　purchasing
a　licence；　and　uniting　themselves　at　any　church　in　this
town？　　Who　needs　to　be　told；　that　if　a　woman　has　a　will
she　will　assuredly　find　a　way？My　belief　is　that　one
day；　when　Miss　Sharp　had　gone　to　pass　the　forenoon
with　her　dear　friend　Miss　Amelia　Sedley　in　Russell
Square；　a　lady　very　like　her　might　have　been　seen
entering　a　church　in　the　City；　in　company　with　a　gentleman
with　dyed　mustachios；　who；　after　a　quarter　of　an　hour's
interval；　escorted　her　back　to　the　hackney…coach　in
waiting；　and　that　this　was　a　quiet　bridal　party。
　　
And　who　on　earth；　after　the　daily　experience　we　have；
can　question　the　probability　of　a　gentleman　marrying
anybody？　How　many　of　the　wise　and　learned　have
married　their　cooks？　　Did　not　Lord　Eldon　himself；　the
most　prudent　of　men；　make　a　runaway　match？　Were　not
Achilles　and　Ajax　both　in　love　with　their　servant　maids？
And　are　we　to　expect　a　heavy　dragoon　with　strong
desires　and　small　brains；　who　had　never　controlled　a
passion　in　his　life；　to　become　prudent　all　of　a　sudden；
and　to　refuse　to　pay　any　price　for　an　indulgence　to
which　he　had　a　mind？　　If　people　only　made　prudent
marriages；　what　a　stop　to　population　there　would　be！
　　
It　seems　to　me；　for　my　part；　that　Mr。　Rawdon's　marriage
was　one　of　the　honestest　actions　which　we　shall　have　to
record　in　any　portion　of　that　gentleman's　biography　which
has　to　do　with　the　present　history。　　No　one　will　say　it　is
unmanly　to　be　captivated　by　a　woman；　or；　being
captivated；　to　marry　her；　and　the　admiration；　the　delight；　the
passion；　the　wonder；　the　unbounded　confidence；　and　frantic　
adoration　with　which；　by　degrees；　this　big　warrior　got
to　regard　the　little　Rebecca；　were　feelings　which　the　ladies
at　least　will　pronounce　were　not　altogether　discreditable
to　him。　　When　she　sang；　every　note　thrilled　in　his　dull
soul；　and　tingled　through　his　huge　frame。　　When　she　spoke；
he　brought　all　the　force　of　his　brains　to　listen　and　wonder。
If　she　was　jocular；　he　used　to　revolve　her　jokes　in　his
mind；　and　explode　over　them　half　an　hour　afterwards　in
the　street；　to　the　surprise　of　the　groom　in　the　tilbury　by
his　side；　or　the　comrade　riding　with　him　in　Rotten　Row。
Her　words　were　oracles　to　him；　her　smallest　actions
marked　by　an　infallible　grace　and　wisdom。　　〃How　she
sings；how　she　paints；〃　thought　he。　　〃How　she　rode　that
kicking　mare　at　Queen's　Crawley！〃　　And　he　would　say　to
her　in　confidential　moments；　〃By　Jove；　Beck；　you're　fit
to　be　Commander…in…Chief；　or　Archbishop　of　Canterbury；
by　Jove。〃　　Is　his　case　a　rare　one？　and　don't　we　see　every
day　in　the　world　many　an　honest　Hercules　at　the
apron…strings　of　Omphale；　and　great　whiskered　Samsons
prostrate　in　Delilah's　lap？
　　
When；　then；　Becky　told　him　that　the　great　crisis　was
near；　and　the　time　for　action　had　arrived；　Rawdon　
expressed　himself　as　ready　to　act　under　her　orders；　as　he
would　be　to　charge　with　his　troop　at　the　command　of　his
colonel。　　There　was　no　need　for　him　to　put　his　letter　into
the　third　volume　of　Porteus。　　Rebecca　easily　found　a
means　to　get　rid　of　Briggs；　her　companion；　and　met　her
faithful　friend　in　〃the　usual　place〃　on　the　next　day。　　She
had　thought　over　matters　at　night；　and　communicated　to
Rawdon　the　result　of　her　determinations。　　He　agreed；　of
course；　to　everything；　was　quite　sure　that　it　was　all
right：　that　what　she　proposed　was　best；　that　Miss　Crawley
would　infallibly　relent；　or　〃come　round；〃　as　he　said；　after
a　time。　　Had　Rebecca's　resolutions　been　entirely　different；
he　would　have　followed　them　as　implicitly。　　〃You　have
head　enough　for　both　of　us；　Beck；〃　said　he。　　〃You're　sure
to　get　us　out　of　the　scrape。　　I　never　saw　your　equal；　and
I've　met　with　some　clippers　in　my　time　too。〃　And　with
this　simple　confession　of　faith；　the　love…stricken　dragoon
left　her　to　execute　his　part　of　the　project　which　she　had
formed　for　the　pair。
　　
It　consisted　simply　in　the　hiring　of　quiet　lodgings　at
Brompton；　or　in　the　neighbourhood　of　the　barracks；　for
Captain　and　Mrs。　Crawley。　　For　Rebecca　had　determined；
and　very　prudently；　we　think；　to　fly。　　Rawdon　was
only　too　happy　at　her　resolve；　he　had　been　entreating
her　to　take　this　measure　any　time　for　weeks　past。　　He
pranced　off　to　engage　the　lodgings　with　all　the　impetuosity
of　love。　　He　agreed　to　pay　two　guineas　a　week　so　readily；
that　the　landlady　regretted　she　had　asked　him　so　little。
He　ordered　in　a　piano；　and　half　a　nursery…house　full　of
flowers：　and　a　heap　of　good　things。　　As　for　shawls；　kid
gloves；　silk　stockings；　gold　French　watches；　bracelets　and
perfumery；　he　sent　them　in　with　the　profusion　of　blind
love　and　unbounded　credit。　　And　having　relieved　his　mind
by　this　outpouring　of　generosity；　he　went　and　dined
nervously　at　the　club；　waiting　until　the　great　moment　of　his
life　should　come。
　　The　occurrences　of　the　previous　day；　the　admirable
conduct　of　Rebecca　in　refusing　an　offer　so　advantageous
to　her；　the　secret　unhappiness　preying　upon　her；　the
sweetness　and　silence　with　which　she　bore　her　affliction；
made　Miss　Crawley　much　more　tender　than　usual。　　An
event　of　this　nature；　a　marriage；　or　a　refusal；　or　a
proposal；　thrills　through　a　whole　household　of　women；　and
sets　all　their　hysterical　sympathies　at　work。　　As　an
observer　of　human　nature；　I　regularly　frequent　St。　George's；
Hanover　Square；　during　the　genteel　marriage　season；　and
though　I　have　never　seen　the　bridegroom's　male　friends
give　way　to　tears；　or　the　beadles　and　officiating　clergy
any　way　affected；　yet　it　is　not　at　all　uncommon　to　see
women　who　are　not　in　the　least　concerned　in　the
operations　going　onold　ladies　who　are　long　past　marrying；
stout　middle…aged　females　with　plenty　of　sons　and　daughters；
let　alone　pretty　young　creatures　in　pink　bonnets；　who
are　on　their　promotion；　and　may　naturally　take　an
interest　in　the　ceremonyI　say　it　is　quite　common　to　see
the　women　present　piping；　sobbing；　sniffling；　hiding　their
little　faces　in　their　little　useless　pocket…handkerchiefs；
and　heaving；　old　and　young；　with　emotion。　　When　my
friend；　the　fashionable　John　Pimlico；　married　the　lovely
Lady　Belgravia　Green　Parker；　the　excitement　was　so
general　that　even　the　little　snuffy　old　pew…opener　who　let　me
into　the　seat　was　in　tears。　　And　wherefore？　I　inquired　of
my　own　soul：　she　was　not　going　to　be　married。
　　
Miss　Crawley　and　Briggs　in　a　word；　after　the　affair　of
Sir　Pitt；　indulged　in　the　utmost　luxury　of　sentiment；　and
Rebecca　became　an　object　of　the　most　tender　interest　to
them。　　In　her　absence　Miss　Crawley　solaced　herself　with
the　most　sentimental　of　the　novels　in　her　library。　　Little
Sharp；　with　her　secret