a laodicean-第58章

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'I　comprehend；'　he　said　thoughtfully。　　'But　since；　by　a
perverse　fate；　I　have　been　thrown　into　your　company；　you　could
hardly　expect　me　to　feel　and　act　otherwise。'

'Perhaps　not。'

'Since　I　have　so　much　reason　to　be　dissatisfied　with　myself；'
he　added；　'I　cannot　refrain　from　criticizing　elsewhere　to　a
slight　extent；　and　thinking　I　have　to　do　with　an　ungenerous
person。'

'Why　ungenerous？'

'In　this　way；　that　since　you　cannot　love　me；　you　see　no　reason
at　all　for　trying　to　do　so　in　the　fact　that　I　so　deeply　love
you；　hence　I　say　that　you　are　rather　to　be　distinguished　by
your　wisdom　than　by　your　humanity。'

'It　comes　to　this；　that　if　your　words　are　all　seriously　meant
it　is　much　to　be　regretted　we　ever　met；'　she　murmured。　　'Now
will　you　go　on　to　where　you　were　going；　and　leave　me　here？'

Without　a　remonstrance　he　went　on；　saying　with　dejected
whimsicality　as　he　smiled　back　upon　her；　'You　show　a　wisdom
which　for　so　young　a　lady　is　perfectly　surprising。'

It　was　resolved　to　prolong　the　journey　by　a　circuit　through
Holland　and　Belgium；　but　nothing　changed　in　the　attitudes　of
Paula　and　Captain　De　Stancy　till　one　afternoon　during　their
stay　at　the　Hague；　when　they　had　gone　for　a　drive　down　to
Scheveningen　by　the　long　straight　avenue　of　chestnuts　and
limes；　under　whose　boughs　tufts　of　wild　parsley　waved　their
flowers；　except　where　the　buitenplaatsen　of　retired　merchants
blazed　forth　with　new　paint　of　every　hue。　　On　mounting　the
dune　which　kept　out　the　sea　behind　the　village　a　brisk　breeze
greeted　their　faces；　and　a　fine　sand　blew　up　into　their　eyes。
De　Stancy　screened　Paula　with　his　umbrella　as　they　stood　with
their　backs　to　the　wind；　looking　down　on　the　red　roofs　of　the
village　within　the　sea　wall；　and　pulling　at　the　long　grass
which　by　some　means　found　nourishment　in　the　powdery　soil　of
the　dune。

When　they　had　discussed　the　scene　he　continued；　'It　always
seems　to　me　that　this　place　reflects　the　average　mood　of　human
life。　　I　mean；　if　we　strike　the　balance　between　our　best　moods
and　our　worst　we　shall　find　our　average　condition　to　stand　at
about　the　same　pitch　in　emotional　colour　as　these　sandy　dunes
and　this　grey　scene　do　in　landscape。'

Paula　contended　that　he　ought　not　to　measure　everybody　by
himself。

'I　have　no　other　standard；'　said　De　Stancy；　'and　if　my　own　is
wrong；　it　is　you　who　have　made　it　so。　　Have　you　thought　any
more　of　what　I　said　at　Cologne？'

'I　don't　quite　remember　what　you　did　say　at　Cologne？'

'My　dearest　life！'　　Paula's　eyes　rounding　somewhat；　he
corrected　the　exclamation。　　'My　dear　Miss　Power；　I　will；
without　reserve；　tell　it　to　you　all　over　again。'

'Pray　spare　yourself　the　effort；'　she　said　drily。　　'What　has
that　one　fatal　step　betrayed　me　into！。　。　。　　Do　you　seriously
mean　to　say　that　I　am　the　cause　of　your　life　being　coloured
like　this　scene　of　grass　and　sand？　　If　so；　I　have　committed　a
very　great　fault！'

'It　can　be　nullified　by　a　word。'

'Such　a　word！'

'It　is　a　very　short　one。'

'There's　a　still　shorter　one　more　to　the　purpose。　　Frankly；　I
believe　you　suspect　me　to　have　some　latent　and　unowned
inclination　for　youthat　you　think　speaking　is　the　only　point
upon　which　I　am　backward。　。　。　。　　There　now；　it　is　raining；
what　shall　we　do？　　I　thought　this　wind　meant　rain。'

'Do？　　Stand　on　here；　as　we　are　standing　now。'

'Your　sister　and　my　aunt　are　gone　under　the　wall。　　I　think　we
will　walk　towards　them。'

'You　had　made　me　hope；'　he　continued　（his　thoughts　apparently
far　away　from　the　rain　and　the　wind　and　the　possibility　of
shelter）；　'that　you　might　change　your　mind；　and　give　to　your
original　promise　a　liberal　meaning　in　renewing　it。　　In　brief　I
mean　this；　that　you　would　allow　it　to　merge　into　an
engagement。　　Don't　think　it　presumptuous；'　he　went　on；　as　he
held　the　umbrella　over　her；　'I　am　sure　any　man　would　speak　as
I　do。　　A　distinct　permission　to　be　with　you　on　probationthat
was　what　you　gave　me　at　Carlsruhe：　　and　flinging　casuistry　on
one　side；　what　does　that　mean？'

'That　I　am　artistically　interested　in　your　family　history。'
And　she　went　out　from　the　umbrella　to　the　shelter　of　the　hotel
where　she　found　her　aunt　and　friend。

De　Stancy　could　not　but　feel　that　his　persistence　had　made
some　impression。　　It　was　hardly　possible　that　a　woman　of
independent　nature　would　have　tolerated　his　dangling　at　her
side　so　long；　if　his　presence　were　wholly　distasteful　to　her。
That　evening　when　driving　back　to　the　Hague　by　a　devious　route
through　the　dense　avenues　of　the　Bosch　he　conversed　with　her
again；　also　the　next　day　when　standing　by　the　Vijver　looking
at　the　swans；　and　in　each　case　she　seemed　to　have　at　least　got
over　her　objection　to　being　seen　talking　to　him；　apart　from
the　remainder　of　the　travelling　party。

Scenes　very　similar　to　those　at　Scheveningen　and　on　the　Rhine
were　enacted　at　later　stages　of　their　desultory　journey。　　Mr。
Power　had　proposed　to　cross　from　Rotterdam；　but　a　stiff　north…
westerly　breeze　prevailing　Paula　herself　became　reluctant　to
hasten　back　to　Stancy　Castle。　　Turning　abruptly　they　made　for
Brussels。

It　was　here；　while　walking　homeward　from　the　Park　one　morning；
that　her　uncle　for　the　first　time　alluded　to　the　situation　of
affairs　between　herself　and　her　admirer。　　The　captain　had　gone
up　the　Rue　Royale　with　his　sister　and　Mrs。　Goodman；　either　to
show　them　the　house　in　which　the　ball　took　place　on　the　eve　of
Quatre　Bras　or　some　other　site　of　interest；　and　the　two　Powers
were　thus　left　to　themselves。　　To　reach　their　hotel　they
passed　into　a　little　street　sloping　steeply　down　from　the　Rue
Royale　to　the　Place　Ste。　Gudule；　where；　at　the　moment　of
nearing　the　cathedral；　a　wedding　party　emerged　from　the　porch
and　crossed　in　front　of　uncle　and　niece。

'I　hope；'　said　the　former；　in　his　passionless　way；　'we　shall
see　a　performance　of　this　sort　between　you　and　Captain　De
Stancy；　not　so　very　long　after　our　return　to　England。'

'Why？'　asked　Paula；　following　the　bride　with　her　eyes。

'It　is　diplomatically；　as　I　may　say；　such　a　highly　correct
thingsuch　an　expedient　thingsuch　an　obvious　thing　to　all
eyes。'

'Not　altogether　to　mine；　uncle；'　she　returned。

''Twould　be　a　thousand　pities　to　let　slip　such　a　neat　offer　of
adjusting　difficulties　as　accident　makes　you　in　this。　　You
could　marry　more　tin；　that's　true；　but　you　don't　want　it；
Paula。　　You　want　a　name；　and　historic　what…do…they…call…it。
Now　by　coming　to　terms　with　the　captain　you'll　be　Lady　De
Stancy　in　a　few　years：　　and　a　title　which　is　useless　to　him；
and　a　fortune　and　castle　which　are　in　some　degree　useless　to
you；　will　make　a　splendid　whole　useful　to　you　both。'

'I've　thought　it　overquite；'　she　answered。　　'And　I　quite　see
what　the　advantages　are。　　But　how　if　I　don't　care　one　atom　for
artistic　completeness　and　a　splendid　whole；　and　do　care　very
much　to　do　what　my　fancy　inclines　me　to　do？'

'Then　I　should　say　that；　taking　a　comprehensive　view　of　human
nature　of　all　colours；　your　fancy　is　about　the　silliest　fancy
existing　on　this　earthly　ball。'

Paula　laughed　indifferently；　and　her　uncle　felt　that；
persistent　as　was　his　nature；　he　was　the　wrong　man　to
influence　her　by　argument。　　Paula's　blindness　to　the
advantages　of　the　match；　if　she　were　blind；　was　that　of　a
woman　who　wouldn't　see；　and　the　best　argument　was　silence。

This　was　in　some　measure　proved　the　next　morning。　　When　Paula
made　her　appearance　Mrs。　Goodman　said；　holding　up　an　envelope：
'Here's　a　letter　from　Mr。　Somerset。'

'Dear　me；'　said　she　blandly；　though　a　quick　little　flush
ascended　her　cheek。　　'I　had　nearly　forgotten　him！'

The　letter　on　being　read　contained　a　request　as　brief　as　it
was　unexpected。　　Having　prepared　all　the　drawings　necessary
for　the　rebuilding；　Somerset　begged　leave　to　resign　the
superintendence　of　the　work　into　other　hands。

'His　letter　caps　your　remarks　very　aptly；'　said　Mrs。　Goodman；
with　secret　triumph。　　'You　are　nearly　forgetting　him；　and　he
is　quite　forgetting　you。'

'Yes；'　said　Paula；　affecting　carelessness。　　'Well；　I　must　get
somebody　else；　I　suppose。'



X。

They　next　deviated　to　Amiens；　intending　to　stay　there　only　one
night；　but　their　schemes　were　deranged　by　the　sudden　illness
of　Charlotte。　　She　had　been　looking　unwell　for　a　fortnight
past；　though；　with　her　usual　self…abnegation；　she　had　made
light　of　her　ailment。　　Even　now　she　declared　she　could　go　on；
but　this　was　said　over…night；　and　in　the　morning　it　was
abundantly　evident　that　to　move　her　was　highly　unadvisable。
Still　she　was　not　in　serious　danger；　and　having　called　in　a
physician；　who　pronounced　rest　indispensable；　they　prepared　to
remain　in　the　old　Picard　capital　two　or　three　additional　days。
Mr。　Power　thought　he　would　take　advantage　of　the　halt　to　run
up　to　Paris；　leaving　De　Stancy　in　charge　of　the　ladies。

In　more　ways　than　in　the　illness　of　Charlotte　this　day　was　the
harbinger　of　a　crisis。

It　was　a　summer　evening　without　a　cloud。　　Charlotte　had　fallen
asleep　in　her　bed；　and　Paula；　who　had　been　sitting　by　her；
looked　out　into　the　Place　St。　Denis；　which　the　hotel
commanded。　　The　lawn　of　the　square　was　all　ablaze　with　red　and
yellow　clumps　of　flowers；　the　acacia　trees　were　brightly
green；　the　sun　was　soft　and　low。　　Tempted　by　the　prospect
Paula　went　and　put　on　her　hat；　and　arousing　her　aunt；　who　was
nodding　in　the　next　room；　to　request　her　to　keep　an　ear　on
Charlotte's　bedroom；　Paula　descended　into　the　Rue　de　Noyon
alone；　and　entered　the　green　enclosure。

While　she　walked　round；　two　or　three　little　children　in　charge
of　a　nurse　trundled　a　large　variegated　ball　along　the　grass；
and　it　rolled　to　Paula's　feet。　　She　smiled　at　them；　and
endeavoured　to　return　it　by　a　slight　kick。　　The　ball　rose　in
the　air；　and　passing　over　the　back　of　a　seat　which　stood　under
one　of　the　trees；　alighted　in　the　lap　of　a　gentleman　hitherto
screened　by　its　boughs。　　The　back　and　shoulders　proved　to　be
those　of　De　Stancy。　　He　turned　his　head；　jumped　up；　and　was　at
her　side　in　an　instant；　a　nettled　flush　having　meanwhile
crossed　Paula's　face。

'I　thought　you　had　gone　to　the　Hotoie　Promenade；'　she　said
hastily。　　'I　am　going　to　the　cathedral；'　（obviously　uttered
lest　it　should　seem　that　she　had　seen　him　from　the　hotel
windows；　and　entered　the　square　for　his　company）。

'Of　course：　　there　is　nothing　else　to　go　to　hereeven　for
Roundheads。'

'If　you　mean　ME　by　that；　you　are　very　much　mistaken；'　said　she
testily。

'The　Roundheads　were　your　ancestors；　and　they　knocked　down　my
ancestors'　castle；　and　broke　the　stained　glass　and　statuary　of
the　cathedral；'　said　De　Stancy　slily；　'and　now　you　go　not　only
to　a　cathedral；　but　to　a　service　of　the　unreformed　Church　in
it。'

'In　a　foreign　country　it　is　different　from　home；'　said　Paula
in　extenuation；　'and　you　of　all　men　should　not　reproach　me　for
tergiversationwhen　it　has　been　brought　about　byby　my
sympathies　with'

'With　the　troubles　of　the　De　Stancys。'

'Well；　you　know　what　I　mean；'　she　answered；　with　considerable
anxiety　not　to　be　misunderstood；　'my　liking　for　the　old
castle；　and　what　it　contains；　and　what　it　suggests。　　I　declare
I　will　not　explain　to　you　furtherwhy　should　I？　　I　am　not
answerable　to　you！'

Paula's　show　of　petulance　was　perhaps　not　wholly　because　she
had　a