in the cage-第12章
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proves blissfully fine; and her mother; at their lodgingspartly
to her embarrassment and partly to her reliefstruck up with the
landlady an alliance that left the younger couple a great deal of
freedom。 This relative took her pleasure of a week at Bournemouth
in a stuffy back…kitchen and endless talks; to that degree even
that Mr。 Mudge himselfhabitually inclined indeed to a scrutiny of
all mysteries and to seeing; as he sometimes admitted; too much in
thingsmade remarks on it as he sat on the cliff with his
betrothed; or on the decks of steamers that conveyed them; close…
packed items in terrific totals of enjoyment; to the Isle of Wight
and the Dorset coast。
He had a lodging in another house; where he had speedily learned
the importance of keeping his eyes open; and he made no secret of
his suspecting that sinister mutual connivances might spring; under
the roof of his companions; from unnatural sociabilities。 At the
same time he fully recognised that as a source of anxiety; not to
say of expense; his future mother…in law would have weighted them
more by accompanying their steps than by giving her hostess; in the
interest of the tendency they considered that they never mentioned;
equivalent pledges as to the tea…caddy and the jam…pot。 These were
the questionsthese indeed the familiar commoditiesthat he had
now to put into the scales; and his betrothed had in consequence;
during her holiday; the odd and yet pleasant and almost languid
sense of an anticlimax。 She had become conscious of an
extraordinary collapse; a surrender to stillness and to retrospect。
She cared neither to walk nor to sail; it was enough for her to sit
on benches and wonder at the sea and taste the air and not be at
Cocker's and not see the counter…clerk。 She still seemed to wait
for somethingsomething in the key of the immense discussions that
had mapped out their little week of idleness on the scale of a
world…atlas。 Something came at last; but without perhaps appearing
quite adequately to crown the monument。
Preparation and precaution were; however; the natural flowers of
Mr。 Mudge's mind; and in proportion as these things declined in one
quarter they inevitably bloomed elsewhere。 He could always; at the
worst; have on Tuesday the project of their taking the Swanage boat
on Thursday; and on Thursday that of their ordering minced kidneys
on Saturday。 He had moreover a constant gift of inexorable enquiry
as to where and what they should have gone and have done if they
hadn't been exactly as they were。 He had in short his resources;
and his mistress had never been so conscious of them; on the other
hand they never interfered so little with her own。 She liked to be
as she wasif it could only have lasted。 She could accept even
without bitterness a rigour of economy so great that the little fee
they paid for admission to the pier had to be balanced against
other delights。 The people at Ladle's and at Thrupp's had THEIR
ways of amusing themselves; whereas she had to sit and hear Mr。
Mudge talk of what he might do if he didn't take a bath; or of the
bath he might take if he only hadn't taken something else。 He was
always with her now; of course; always beside her; she saw him more
than 〃hourly;〃 more than ever yet; more even than he had planned
she should do at Chalk Farm。 She preferred to sit at the far end;
away from the band and the crowd; as to which she had frequent
differences with her friend; who reminded her often that they could
have only in the thick of it the sense of the money they were
getting back。 That had little effect on her; for she got back her
money by seeing many things; the things of the past year; fall
together and connect themselves; undergo the happy relegation that
transforms melancholy and misery; passion and effort; into
experience and knowledge。
She liked having done with them; as she assured herself she had
practically done; and the strange thing was that she neither missed
the procession now nor wished to keep her place for it。 It had
become there; in the sun and the breeze and the sea…smell; a far…
away story; a picture of another life。 If Mr。 Mudge himself liked
processions; liked them at Bournemouth and on the pier quite as
much as at Chalk Farm or anywhere; she learned after a little not
to be worried by his perpetual counting of the figures that made
them up。 There were dreadful women in particular; usually fat and
in men's caps and write shoes; whom he could never let alonenot
that she cared; it was not the great world; the world of Cocker's
and Ladle's and Thrupp's; but it offered an endless field to his
faculties of memory; philosophy; and frolic。 She had never
accepted him so much; never arranged so successfully for making him
chatter while she carried on secret conversations。 This separate
commerce was with herself; and if they both practised a great
thrift she had quite mastered that of merely spending words enough
to keep him imperturbably and continuously going。
He was charmed with the panorama; not knowingor at any rate not
at all showing that he knewwhat far other images peopled her mind
than the women in the navy caps and the shop…boys in the blazers。
His observations on these types; his general interpretation of the
show; brought home to her the prospect of Chalk Farm。 She wondered
sometimes that he should have derived so little illumination;
during his period; from the society at Cocker's。 But one evening
while their holiday cloudlessly waned he gave her such a proof of
his quality as might have made her ashamed of her many
suppressions。 He brought out something that; in all his overflow;
he had been able to keep back till other matters were disposed of。
It was the announcement that he was at last ready to marrythat he
saw his way。 A rise at Chalk Farm had been offered him; he was to
be taken into the business; bringing with him a capital the
estimation of which by other parties constituted the handsomest
recognition yet made of the head on his shoulders。 Therefore their
waiting was overit could be a question of a near date。 They
would settle this date before going back; and he meanwhile had his
eye on a sweet little home。 He would take her to see it on their
first Sunday。
CHAPTER XIX
His having kept this great news for the last; having had such a
card up his sleeve and not floated it out in the current of his
chatter and the luxury of their leisure; was one of those
incalculable strokes by which he could still affect her; the kind
of thing that reminded her of the latent force that had ejected the
drunken soldieran example of the profundity of which his
promotion was the proof。 She listened a while in silence; on this
occasion; to the wafted strains of the music; she took it in as she
had not quite done before that her future was now constituted。 Mr。
Mudge was distinctly her fate; yet at this moment she turned her
face quite away from him; showing him so long a mere quarter of her
cheek that she at last again heard his voice。 He couldn't see a
pair of tears that were partly the reason of her delay to give him
the assurance he required; but he expressed at a venture the hope
that she had had her fill of Cocker's。
She was finally able to turn back。 〃Oh quite。 There's nothing
going on。 No one comes but the Americans at Thrupp's; and they
don't do much。 They don't seem to have a secret in the world。〃
〃Then the extraordinary reason you've been giving me for holding on
there has ceased to work?〃
She thought a moment。 〃Yes; that one。 I've seen the thing
throughI've got them all in my pocket。〃
〃So you're ready to come?〃
For a little again she made no answer。 〃No; not yet; all the same。
I've still got a reasona different one。〃
He looked her all over as if it might have been something she kept
in her mouth or her glove or under her jacketsomething she was
even sitting upon。 〃Well; I'll have it; please。〃
〃I went out the other night and sat in the Park with a gentleman;〃
she said at last。
Nothing was ever seen like his confidence in her and she wondered a
little now why it didn't irritate her。 It only gave her ease and
space; as she felt; for telling him the whole truth that no one
knew。 It had arrived at present at her really wanting to do that;
and yet to do it not in the least for Mr。 Mudge; but altogether and
only for herself。 This truth filled out for her there the whole
experience about to relinquish; suffused and coloured it as a
picture that she should keep and that; describe it as she might; no
one but herself would ever really see。 Moreover she had no desire
whatever to make Mr。 Mudge jealous; there would be no amusement in
it; for the amusement she had lately known had spoiled her for
lower pleasures。 There were even no materials for it。 The odd
thing was how she never doubted that; properly handled; his passion
was poisonable; what had happened was that he had cannily selected
a partner with no poison to distil。 She read then and there that
she should never interest herself in anybody as to whom some other
sentiment; some superior view; wouldn't be sure to interfere for
him with jealousy。 〃And what did you get out of that?〃 he asked
with a concern that was not in the least for his honour。
〃Nothing but a good chance to promise him I wouldn't forsake him。
He's one of my customers。〃
〃Then it's for him not to forsake YOU。〃
〃Well; he won't。 It's all right。 But I must just keep on as long
as he may want me。〃
〃Want you to sit with him in the Park?〃
〃He may want me for thatbut I shan't。 I rather liked it; but
once; under the circumstances; is enough。 I can do better for him
in another manner。〃
〃And what manner; pray?〃
〃Well; elsewhere。〃
〃Elsewhere?I SAY!〃
This was an ejaculation used also by Captain Everard; but oh with
what a different sound! 〃You needn't 'say'there's nothing to be
said。 And yet you ought perhaps to know。〃
〃Certainly I ought。 But WHATup to now?〃
〃Why exactly what I told him。 That I'd do anything for him。〃
〃What do you mean by 'anything'?〃
〃Everything。〃
Mr。 Mudge's immediate comment on this statement was to draw from
his pocket a crumpled paper containing the remains of half a pound
of 〃sundries。〃 These sundries had figured conspicuously in his
prospective sketch of their tour; but it was only at the end of
three days that they had defined themselves unmistakeably as
chocolate…creams。 〃Have another?THAT one;〃 he said。 She had
another; but not the one he indicated; and then he continued:
〃What took place afterwards?〃
〃Afterwards?〃
〃What did you do when you had told him you'd do everything?〃
〃I simply came away。〃
〃Out of the Park?〃
〃Yes; leaving him there。 I didn't let him follow me。〃
〃T