crime and punishment(罪与罚)-第31章
按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
algebra or what not！ I don't understand it！ Well； that's all nonsense。
Only； seeing that you are not a student now and have lost your lessons
and your clothes； and that through the young lady's death she has no
need to treat you as a relation； she suddenly took fright； and as
you hid in your den and dropped all your old relations with her； she
planned to get rid of you。 And she's been cherishing that design a
long time； but was sorry to lose the I。O。U。 for you assured her
yourself that your mother would pay。〃
〃It was base of me to say that。。。。 My mother herself is almost a
beggar。。。 and I told a lie to keep my lodging。。。 and be fed；〃
Raskolnikov said loudly and distinctly。
〃Yes； you did very sensibly。 But the worst of it is that at that
point Mr。 Tchebarov turns up； a business man。 Pashenka would never
have thought of doing anything on her own account； she is too
retiring； but the business man is by no means retiring； and first
thing he puts the question； 'Is there any hope of realising the
I。O。U。？' Answer： there is； because he has a mother who would save
her Rodya with her hundred and twenty…five roubles pension； if she has
to starve herself； and a sister； too； who would go into bondage for
his sake。 That's what he was building upon。。。。 Why do you start？ I
know all the ins and outs of your affairs now； my dear boy… it's not
for nothing that you were so open with Pashenka when you were her
prospective son…in…law； and I say all this as a friend。。。。 But I
tell you what it is； an honest and sensitive man is open； and a
business man 'listens and goes on eating' you up。 Well； then she
gave the I。O。U。 by way of payment to this Tchebarov； and without
hesitation he made a formal demand for payment。 When I heard of all
this I wanted to blow him up； too； to clear my conscience； but by that
time harmony reigned between me and Pashenka； and I insisted on
stopping the whole affair； engaging that you would pay。 I went
security for you； brother。 Do you understand？ We called Tchebarov；
flung him ten roubles and got the I。O。U。 back from him； and here I
have the honour of presenting it to you。 She trusts your word now。
Here； take it； you see I have torn it。〃
Razumihin put the note on the table。 Raskolnikov looked at him and
turned to the wall without uttering a word。 Even Razumihin felt a
twinge。
〃I see； brother；〃 he said a moment later； 〃that I have been
playing the fool again。 I thought I should amuse you with my
chatter； and I believe I have only made you cross。〃
〃Was it you I did not recognise when I was delirious？〃 Raskolnikov
asked； after a moment's pause without turning his head。
〃Yes； and you flew into a rage about it； especially when I brought
Zametov one day。〃
〃Zametov？ The head clerk？ What for？〃 Raskolnikov turned round
quickly and fixed his eyes on Razumihin。
〃What's the matter with you？。。。 What are you upset about？ He
wanted to make your acquaintance because I talked to him a lot about
you。。。。 How could I have found out so much except from him？ He is a
capital fellow； brother； first…rate。。。 in his own way； of course。
Now we are friends… see each other almost every day。 I have moved into
this part； you know。 I have only just moved。 I've been with him to
Luise Ivanovna once or twice。。。。 Do you remember Luise； Luise
Ivanovna？
〃Did I say anything in delirium？〃
〃I should think so！ You were beside yourself。〃
〃What did I rave about？〃
〃What next？ What did you rave about？ What people do rave about。。。。
Well； brother； now I must not lose time。 To work。〃 He got up from
the table and took up his cap。
〃What did I rave about？〃
〃How he keeps on！ Are you afraid of having let out some secret？
Don't worry yourself； you said nothing about a countess。 But you
said a lot about a bulldog； and about ear…rings and chains； and
about Krestovsky Island； and some porter； and Nikodim Fomitch and Ilya
Petrovitch； the assistant superintendent。 And another thing that was
of special interest to you was your own sock。 You whined； 'Give me
my sock。' Zametov hunted all about your room for your socks； and
with his own scented； ring…bedecked fingers he gave you the rag。 And
only then were you comforted； and for the next twenty…four hours you
held the wretched thing in your hand； we could not get it from you。 It
is most likely somewhere under your quilt at this moment。 And then you
asked so piteously for fringe for your trousers。 We tried to find
out what sort of fringe； but we could not make it out。 Now to
business！ Here are thirty…five roubles； I take ten of them； and
shall give you an account of them in an hour or two。 I will let
Zossimov know at the same time； though he ought to have been here long
ago； for it is nearly twelve。 And you； Nastasya； look in pretty
often while I am away； to see whether he wants a drink or anything
else。 And I will tell Pashenka what is wanted myself。 Good…bye！〃
〃He calls her Pashenka！ Ah； he's a deep one！〃 said Nastasya as he
went out； then she opened the door and stood listening； but could
not resist running downstairs after him。 She was very eager to hear
what he would say to the landlady。 She was evidently quite
fascinated by Razumihin。
No sooner had she left the room than the sick man flung off the
bedclothes and leapt out of bed like a madman。 With burning； switching
impatience he had waited for them to be gone so that he might set to
work。 But to what work？ Now； as though to spite him； it eluded him。
〃Good God； only tell me one thing： do they know of it yet or not？
What if they know it and are only pretending； mocking me while I am
laid up； and then they will come in and tell me that it's been
discovered long ago and that they have only。。。 What am I to do now？
That's what I've forgotten； as though on purpose； forgotten it all
at once； I remembered a minute ago。〃
He stood in the middle of the room and gazed in miserable
bewilderment about him； he walked to the door； opened it； listened；
but that was not what he wanted。 Suddenly； as though recalling
something； he rushed to the corner where there was a hole under the
paper； began examining it； put his hand into the hole； fumbled… but
that was not it。 He went to the stove； opened it and began rummaging
in the ashes； the frayed edges of his trousers and the rags cut off
his pocket were lying there just as he had thrown them。 No one had
looked； then！ Then he remembered； the sock about which Razumihin had
just been telling him。 Yes； there it lay on the sofa under the
quilt； but it was so covered with dust and grime that Zametov could
not have seen anything on it。
〃Bah； Zametov！ The police office！ And why am I sent for to the
police office？ Where's the notice？ Bah！ I am mixing it up； that was
then。 I looked at my sock then； too； but now。。。 now I have been ill。
But what did Zametov come for？ Why did Razumihin bring him？〃 he
muttered； helplessly sitting on the sofa again。 〃What does it mean？ Am
I still in delirium； or is it real？ I believe it is real。。。。 Ah； I
remember； I must escape！ Make haste to escape。 Yes； I must； I must
escape！ Yes。。。 but where？ And where are my clothes？ I've no boots。
They've taken them away！ They've hidden them！ I understand！ Ah； here
is my coat… they passed that over！ And here is money on the table；
thank God！ And here's the I。O。U。。。。 I'll take the money and go and
take another lodging。 They won't find me！。。。 Yes； but the address
bureau？ They'll find me； Razumihin will find me。 Better escape
altogether。。。 far away。。。 to America； and let them do their worst！ And
take the I。O。U。。。。 it would be of use there。。。。 What else shall I
take？ They think I am ill！ They don't know that I can walk；
ha…ha…ha！ I could see by their eyes that they know all about it！ If
only I could get downstairs！ And what if they have set a watch
there… policemen！ What's this tea？ Ah； and here is beer left； half a
bottle； cold！〃
He snatched up the bottle； which still contained a glassful of beer；
and gulped it down with relish； as though quenching a flame in his
breast。 But in another minute the beer had gone to his head； and a
faint and even pleasant shiver ran down his spine。 He lay down and
pulled the quilt over him。 His sick and incoherent thoughts grew
more and more disconnected； and soon a light； pleasant drowsiness came
upon him。 With a sense of comfort he nestled his head in the pillow；
wrapped more closely about him the soft； wadded quilt which had
replaced the old； ragged great…coat； sighed softly and sank into a
deep； sound； refreshing sleep。
He woke up； hearing some one come in。 He opened his eyes and saw
Razumihin standing in the doorway； uncertain whether to come in or
not。 Raskolnikov sat up quickly on the sofa and gazed at him； as
though trying to recall something。
〃Ah； you are not asleep！ Here I am！ Nastasya； bring in the
parcel！〃 Razumihin shouted down the stairs。 〃You shall have the
account directly。〃
〃What time is it？〃 asked Raskolnikov； looking round uneasily。
〃Yes； you had a fine sleep； brother； it's almost eve
