the pursuit of the house-boat-第12章

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nicate　of　great　importance。〃

〃Why　isn't　he　here　already；　then？　　It　wouldn't　take　him　two　minutes　to　get　from　the　deck　here；〃　asked　the　ever…auspicious　Le　Coq。

〃It　is　simple；〃　returned　Holmes；　calmly。　　〃If　you　will　go　yourself　and　slide　down　that　mast　you　will　see。　　Shem　has　stopped　for　a　little　witch…hazel　to　soothe　his　burns。　　It　is　no　cool　matter　sliding　down　a　mast　two　hundred　feet　in　height。〃

As　Sherlock　Holmes　spoke　the　door　burst　open　and　Shem　rushed　in。

〃A　signal　of　distress；　captain！〃　he　cried。

〃From　what　quarterto　larboard？〃　asked　Holmes。

〃No；〃　returned　Shem；　breathless。

〃Then　it　must　be　dead　ahead；〃　said　Holmes。

〃Why　not　to　starboard？〃　asked　Le　Coq；　dryly。

〃Because；〃　answered　Holmes；　confidently；　〃it　never　happens　so。　　If　you　had　ever　read　a　truly　exciting　sea…tale；　my　dear　Le　Coq；　you　would　have　known　that　interesting　things；　and　particularly　signals　of　distress；　are　never　seen　except　to　larboard　or　dead　ahead。〃

A　murmur　of　applause　greeted　this　retort；　and　Le　Coq　subsided。

〃The　nature　of　the　signal？〃　demanded　Holmes。

〃A　black　flag；　skull　and　cross…bones　down；　at　half…mast！〃　cried　Shem；　〃and　on　a　rock…bound　coast！〃

〃They're　marooned；　by　heavens！〃　shouted　Holmes；　springing　to　his　feet　and　rushing　to　the　deck；　where　he　was　joined　immediately　by　Sir　Walter；　Dr。　Johnson；　Bonaparte；　and　the　others。

〃Isn't　he　a　daisy？〃　whispered　Demosthenes　to　Diogenes　as　they　climbed　the　stairs。

〃He　is　more　than　that；　he's　a　blooming　orchid；〃　said　Diogenes；　with　intense　enthusiasm。　　〃I　think　I'll　get　my　X…ray　lantern　and　see　if　he's　honest。〃



CHAPTER　IX：　　CAPTAIN　KIDD　MEETS　WITH　AN　OBSTACLE



〃Excuse　me；　your　Majesty；〃　remarked　Helen　of　Troy　as　Cleopatra　accorded　permission　to　Captain　Kidd　to　speak；　〃I　have　not　been　introduced　to　this　gentleman　nor　has　he　been　presented　to　me；　and　I　really　cannot　consent　to　any　proceeding　so　irregular　as　this。　　I　do　not　speak　to　gentlemen　I　have　not　met；　nor　do　I　permit　them　to　address　me。〃

〃Hear；　hear！〃　cried　Xanthippe。　　〃I　quite　agree　with　the　principle　of　my　young　friend　from　Troy。　　It　may　be　that　when　we　claimed　for　ourselves　all　the　rights　of　men　that　the　right　to　speak　and　be　spoken　to　by　other　men　without　an　introduction　will　included　in　the　list；　but　I　for　one　have　no　desire　to　avail　myself　of　the　privilege；　especially　when　it's　a　horrid…looking　man　like　this。〃

Kidd　bowed　politely；　and　smiled　so　terribly　that　several　of　the　ladies　fainted。

〃I　will　withdraw；〃　he　said；　turning　to　Cleopatra；　and　it　must　be　said　that　his　suggestion　was　prompted　by　his　heartfelt　wish；　for　now　that　he　found　himself　thus　conspicuously　brought　before　so　many　women；　with　falsehood　on　his　lips；　his　courage　began　to　ooze。

〃Not　yet；　please；〃　answered　the　chairlady。　　〃I　imagine　we　can　get　about　this　difficulty　without　much　trouble。〃

〃I　think　it　a　perfectly　proper　objection　too；〃　observed　Delilah；　rising。　　〃If　we　ever　needed　etiquette　we　need　it　now。　　But　I　have　a　plan　which　will　obviate　any　further　difficulty。　　If　there　is　no　one　among　us　who　is　sufficiently　well　acquainted　with　the　gentleman　to　present　him　formally　to　us；　I　will　for　the　time　being　take　upon　myself　the　office　of　ship's　barber　and　cut　his　hair。　　I　understand　that　it　is　quite　the　proper　thing　for　barbers　to　talk；　while　cutting　their　hair；　to　persons　to　whom　they　have　not　been　introduced。　　And；　besides；　he　really　needs　a　hair…cut　badly。　　Thus　I　shall　establish　an　acquaintance　with　the　captain；　after　which　I　can　with　propriety　introduce　him　to　the　rest　of　you。〃

〃Perhaps　the　gentleman　himself　might　object　to　that；〃　put　in　Queen　Elizabeth。　　〃If　I　remember　rightly；　your　last　customer　was　very　much　dissatisfied　with　the　trim　you　gave　him。〃

〃It　will　be　unnecessary　to　do　what　Delilah　proposes；〃　said　Mrs。　Noah；　with　a　kindly　smile；　as　she　rose　up　from　the　corner　in　which　she　had　been　sitting；　an　interested　listener。　　〃I　can　introduce　the　gentleman　to　you　all　with　perfect　propriety。　　He's　a　member　of　my　family。　　His　grandfather　was　the　great…grandson　a　thousand　and　eight　times　removed　of　my　son　Shem's　great…grandnephew　on　his　father's　side。　　His　relationship　to　me　is　therefore　obvious；　though　from　what　I　know　of　his　reputation　I　think　he　takes　more　after　my　husband's　ancestors　than　my　own。　　Willie；　dear；　these　ladies　are　friends　of　mine。　Ladies；　this　young　man　is　one　of　my　most　famous　descendants。　　He　has　been　a　man　of　many　adventures；　and　he　has　been　hanged　once；　which；　far　from　making　him　undesirable　as　an　acquaintance；　has　served　merely　to　render　him　harmless；　and　therefore　a　safe　person　to　know。　　Now；　my　son；　go　ahead　and　speak　your　piece。〃

The　good　old　spirit　sat　down；　and　the　scruples　of　the　objectors　having　thus　been　satisfied；　Captain　Kidd　began。

〃Now　that　I　know　you　all；〃　he　remarked；　as　pleasantly　as　he　could　under　the　circumstances；　〃I　feel　that　I　can　speak　more　freely；　and　certainly　with　a　great　deal　less　embarrassment　than　if　I　were　addressing　a　gathering　of　entire　strangers。　　I　am　not　much　of　a　hand　at　speaking；　and　have　always　felt　somewhat　nonplussed　at　finding　myself　in　a　position　of　this　nature。　　In　my　whole　career　I　never　experienced　but　one　irresistible　impulse　to　make　a　public　address　of　any　length；　and　that　was　upon　that　unhappy　occasion　to　which　the　greatest　and　grandest　of　my　great…grandmothers　has　alluded；　and　that　only　as　the　chain　by　which　I　was　suspended　in　mid…air　tightened　about　my　vocal　chords。　　At　that　moment　I　could　have　talked　impromptu　for　a　year；　so　fast　and　numerously　did　thoughts　of　the　uttermost　import　surge　upward　into　my　brain；　but　circumstances　over　which　I　had　no　control　prevented　the　utterance　of　those　thoughts；　and　that　speech　is　therefore　lost　to　the　world。〃

〃He　has　the　gift　of　continuity；〃　observed　Madame　Recamier。

〃Ought　to　be　in　the　United　States　Senate；〃　smiled　Elizabeth。

〃I　wish　I　could　make　up　my　mind　as　to　whether　he　is　outrageously　handsome　or　desperately　ugly；〃　remarked　Helen　of　Troy。　　〃He　fascinates　me；　but　whether　it　is　the　fascination　of　liking　or　of　horror　I　can't　tell；　and　it's　quite　important。〃

〃Ladies；〃　resumed　the　captain；　his　uneasiness　increasing　as　he　came　to　the　point；　〃I　am　but　the　agent　of　your　respective　husbands；　fiances；　and　other　masculine　guardians。　　The　gentlemen　who　were　previously　the　tenants　of　this　club…house　have　delegated　to　me　the　important；　and　I　may　add　highly　agreeable；　task　of　showing　you　the　world。　　They　have　noted　of　late　years　the　growth　of　that　feeling　of　unrest　which　is　becoming　every　day　more　and　more　conspicuous　in　feminine　circles　in　all　parts　of　the　universeon　the　earth；　where　women　are　clamoring　to　vote；　and　to　be　allowed　to　go　out　late　at　night　without　an　escort；　in　Hades；　where；　as　you　are　no　doubt　aware；　the　management　of　the　government　has　fallen　almost　wholly　into　the　hands　of　the　Furies；　and　even　in　the　halls　of　Jupiter　himself；　where；　I　am　credibly　informed；　Juno　has　been　taking　private　lessons　in　the　art　of　hurling　thunderboltsinformation　which　the　extraordinary　quality　of　recent　electrical　storms　on　the　earth　would　seem　to　confirm。　　Thunderbolts　of　late　years　have　been　cast　hither　and　yon　in　a　most　erratic　fashion；　striking　where　they　were　least　expected；　as　those　of　you　who　keep　in　touch　with　the　outer　world　must　be　fully　aware。　　Now；　actuated　by　their　usual　broad　and　liberal　motives；　the　men　of　Hades　wish　to　meet　the　views　of　you　ladies　to　just　that　extent　that　your　views　are　based　upon　a　wise　selection；　in　turn　based　upon　experience；　and　they　have　come　to　me　and　in　so　many　words　have　said；　'Mr。　Kidd；　we　wish　the　women　of　Hades　to　see　the　world。　　We　want　them　to　be　satisfied。　　We　do　not　like　this　constantly　increasing　spirit　of　unrest。　　We；　who　have　seen　all　the　life　that　we　care　to　see；　do　not　ourselves　feel　equal　to　the　task　of　showing　them　about。　　We　will　pay　you　liberally　if　you　will　take　our　House…boat；　which　they　have　always　been　anxious　to　enter；　and　personally　conduct　our　beloved　ones　to　Paris；　London；　and　elsewhere。　　Let　them　see　as　much　of　life　as　they　can　stand。　　Accord　them　every　privilege。　　Spare　no　expense；　only　bring　them　back　again　to　us　safe　and　sound。'　　These　were　their　words；　ladies。　　I　asked　them　why　they　didn't　come　along　themselves；　saying　that　even　if　they　were　tired　of　it　all；　they　should　make　some　personal　sacrifice　to　your　comfort；　and　they　answered；　reasonably　and　well；　that　they　would　be　only　too　glad　to　do　so；　but　that　they　feared　they　might　unconsciously　seem　to　exert　a　repressing　influence　upon　you。　　'We　want　them　to　feel　absolutely　free；　Captain　Kidd；'　said　they；　'and　if　we　are　along　they　may　not　feel　so。'　　The　answer　was　convincing；　ladies；　and　I　accepted　the　commission。〃

〃But　we　knew　nothing　of　all　this；〃　interposed　Elizabeth。　　〃The　subject　was　not　broached　to　us　by　our　husbands；　brothers；　fiances；　or　fathers。　　My　brother；　Sir　Walter　Raleigh〃

Cleopatra　chuckled。　　〃Brother！　　Brother's　good；〃　she　said。

〃Well；　that's　what　he　is；〃　retorted　Elizabeth；　quickly。　　〃I　promised　to　be　a　sister　to　him；　and　I'm　going　to　keep　my　word。　　That's　the　kind　of　a　queen　I　am。　　I　was　about　to　remark；〃　Elizabeth　added；　turning　to　the　captain；　〃that　my　brother；　Sir　Walter　Raleigh；　never　even　hinted　at　any　such　plan；　and　usually　he　asked　my　advice　in　matters　of　so　great　importance。〃

〃That　is　easily　accounted　for；　madame；〃　retorted　Kidd。　　〃Sir　Walter　intended　this　as　a　little　surprise　for　you；　that　is　all。　　The　arrangements　were　all　placed　in　his　hands；　and　it　was　he　who　bound　us　all　to　secrecy。　　None　of　the　ladies　were　to　be　informed　of　it。〃

〃It　does　not　sound　altogether　plausible；〃　interposed　Portia。　　〃If　you　ladies　do　not　object；　I　should　like　to　cross…examine　thisah　gentleman。〃

Kidd　paled　visibly。　　He　was　not　prepared　for　any　such　trial；　however；　he　put　as　good　a　face　on　the　matter　as　he　could；　and　announced　his　willingness　to　answer　any　questions　that　he　might　be　asked。

〃Shall　we　put　him　under　oath？〃　asked　Cleopatra。

〃As　you　please；　ladies；〃　said　the　pirate。　　〃A　pirate's　word　is　as　good　as　his　bond；　but　I'll　take　an　oath　if　you　choosea　half…dozen　of　'em；　if　need　be。〃

〃I　fancy　we　can　get　along　without　that；〃　said　Portia。　　〃Now；　Captain　Kidd；　who　first　proposed　this　plan？〃

〃Socrates；〃　said　Kidd；　unblushingly　with　a　sly　glance　at　Xanthippe。

〃What？〃　cried　Xanthippe。　　〃My　husband　propose　anything　that　would　contribute　to　my　pleasure　or　intellectual　advancement？　　Bah！　　Your　story　is　transparently　false　at　the　outset。〃

〃Nevertheless；〃　said　Kidd；　〃the　scheme　was　proposed　by　Socrates。　　He　said　a　trip　of　that　kind　for　Xanthippe　would　be　very　restful　and　health…giving。〃

〃For　me？〃　cried　Xanthippe；　sceptically。

〃No；　madame；　for　him；〃　retorted　Kidd。

〃Ahho…ho！　　That's　the　way　of　it；　eh？〃　said　Xanthippe；　flushing　to　the　roots　of　her　hair。　　〃Very　likely。　　Youahyou　will　excuse　my　doubting　your　word；　Captain　Kidd；　a　moment　since。　　I　withdraw　my　remark；　and　in　order　to　make　fullest　reparation；　I　beg　to　assure　these　ladies　that　I　am　now　perfectly　convinced　that　you　are　telling　the　truth。　　That　last　observation　is　just　like　my　husband；　and　when　I　get　back　home　again；　if　I　ever　do；　wellha；　ha！we'll　have　a　merry　time；　that's　all。〃

〃And　what　wasahBassanio's　connection　with　this　affair？〃　added　Portia；　hesitatingly。

〃He　was　not　informed　of　it；〃　said　Kidd；　a