dona perecta-第35章

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is　path！　It　is　now　too　late。　The　passions　will　not　brook　delay。　They　are　impatient；　and　demand　their　prey　with　cries　and　with　the　convulsive　eagerness　of　a　fierce　moral　thirst。　I　have　succumbed。　I　cannot　forget　what　you　so　often　said　to　me；　that　anger　may　be　called　the　worst　of　the　passions；　since；　suddenly　transforming　the　character；　it　engenders　all　the　others；　and　lends　to　each　its　own　infernal　fire。

〃But　it　is　not　anger　alone　that　has　brought　me　to　the　state　of　mind　which　I　have　described。　A　more　expansive　and　noble　sentimentthe　profound　and　ardent　love　which　I　have　for　my　cousin；　has　also　contributed　to　it；　and　this　is　the　one　thing　that　absolves　me　in　my　own　estimation。　But　if　love　had　not　done　so；　pity　would　have　impelled　me　to　brave　the　fury　and　the　intrigues　of　your　terrible　sister；　for　poor　Rosario；　placed　between　an　irresistible　affection　and　her　mother；　is　at　the　present　moment　one　of　the　most　unhappy　beings　on　the　face　of　the　earth。　The　love　which　she　has　for　me；　and　which　responds　to　minedoes　it　not　give　me　the　right　to　open；　in　whatever　way　I　can；　the　doors　of　her　house　and　take　her　out　of　it；　employing　the　law；　as　far　as　the　law　reaches；　and　using　force　at　the　point　where　the　law　ceases　to　support　me？　I　think　that　your　rigid　moral　scrupulosity　will　not　give　an　affirmative　answer　to　this　question；　but　I　have　ceased　to　be　the　upright　and　methodical　character　whose　conscience　was　in　exact　conformity　with　the　dictates　of　the　moral　law。　I　am　no　longer　the　man　whom　an　almost　perfect　education　enabled　to　keep　his　emotions　under　strict　control。　To…day　I　am　a　man　like　other　men；　at　a　single　step　I　have　crossed　the　line　which　separates　the　just　and　the　good　from　the　unjust　and　the　wicked。　Prepare　yourself　to　hear　of　some　dreadful　act　committed　by　me。　I　will　take　care　to　notify　you　of　all　my　misdeeds。

〃But　the　confession　of　my　faults　will　not　relieve　me　from　the　responsibility　of　the　serious　occurrences　which　have　taken　place　and　which　are　taking　place；　nor　will　this　responsibility；　no　matter　how　much　I　may　argue；　fall　altogether　on　your　sister。　Dona　Perfecta's　responsibility　is　certainly　very　great。　What　will　be　the　extent　of　mine！　Ah；　dear　father！　believe　nothing　of　what　you　hear　about　me；　believe　only　what　I　shall　tell　you。　If　they　tell　you　that　I　have　committed　a　deliberate　piece　of　villany；　answer　that　it　is　a　lie。　It　is　difficult；　very　difficult；　for　me　to　judge　myself；　in　the　state　of　disquietude　in　which　I　am；　but　I　dare　assure　you　that　I　have　not　deliberately　given　cause　for　scandal。　You　know　well　to　what　extremes　passion　can　lead　when　circumstances　favor　its　fierce；　its　all…invading　growth。

〃What　is　most　bitter　to　me　is　the　thought　of　having　employed　artifice；　deceit；　and　base　concealmentsI　who　was　truth　itself。　I　am　humiliated　in　my　own　estimation。　But　is　this　the　greatest　perversity　into　which　the　soul　can　fall？　Am　I　beginning　now；　or　have　I　ended？　I　cannot　tell。　If　Rosario　with　her　angelic　hand　does　not　take　me　out　of　this　hell　of　my　conscience；　I　desire　that　you　should　come　to　take　me　out　of　it。　My　cousin　is　an　angel；　and　suffering；　as　she　has　done；　for　my　sake；　she　has　taught　me　a　great　many　things　that　I　did　not　know　before。

〃Do　not　be　surprised　at　the　incoherence　of　what　I　write。　Diverse　emotions　inflame　me；　thoughts　at　times　assail　me　truly　worthy　of　my　immortal　soul；　but　at　times　also　I　fall　into　a　lamentable　state　of　dejection；　and　I　am　reminded　of　the　weak　and　degenerate　characters　whose　baseness　you　have　painted　to　me　in　such　strong　colors；　in　order　that　I　might　abhor　them。　In　the　state　in　which　I　am　to…day　I　am　ready　for　good　or　for　evil。　God　have　pity　upon　me！　I　already　know　what　prayer　isa　solemn　and　reflexive　supplication；　so　personal　that　it　is　not　compatible　with　formulas　learned　by　heart；　an　expansion　of　the　soul　which　dares　to　reach　out　toward　its　source；　the　opposite　of　remorse；　in　which　the　soul；　at　war　with　itself；　seeks　in　vain　to　defend　itself　by　sophisms　and　concealments。　You　have　taught　me　many　good　things；　but　now　I　am　practising；　as　we　engineers　say；　I　am　studying　on　the　ground；　and　in　this　way　my　knowledge　will　become　broadened　and　confirmed。　I　begin　to　imagine　now　that　I　am　not　so　wicked　as　I　myself　believe。　Am　I　right？

〃I　end　this　letter　in　haste。　I　must　send　it　with　some　soldiers　who　are　going　in　the　direction　of　the　station　at　Villahorrenda；　for　the　post…　office　of　this　place　is　not　to　be　trusted。〃



〃APRIL　14。

〃It　would　amuse　you；　dear　father；　if　I　could　make　you　understand　the　ideas　of　the　people　of　this　wretched　town。　You　know　already　that　almost　all　the　country　is　up　in　arms。　It　was　a　thing　to　be　anticipated；　and　the　politicians　are　mistaken　if　they　imagine　that　it　will　be　over　in　a　couple　of　days。　Hostility　to　us　and　to　the　Government　is　innate　in　the　Orbajosan's　mind；　and　forms　a　part　of　it　as　much　as　his　religious　faith。　Confining　myself　to　the　particular　question　with　my　aunt；　I　will　tell　you　a　singular　thingthe　poor　lady；　who　is　penetrated　by　the　spirit　of　feudalism　to　the　marrow　of　her　bones；　has　taken　it　into　her　head　that　I　am　going　to　attack　her　house　and　carry　off　her　daughter；　as　the　gentlemen　of　the　Middle　Ages　attacked　an　enemy's　castle　to　consummate　some　outrage。　Don't　laugh；　for　it　is　the　truthsuch　are　the　ideas　of　these　people。　I　need　not　tell　you　that　she　regards　me　as　a　monster；　as　a　sort　of　heretic　Moorish　king；　and　of　the　officers　here　who　are　my　friends　she　has　no　better　opinion。　In　Dona　Perfecta's　house　it　is　a　matter　of　firm　belief　that　the　army　and　I　have　formed　a　diabolical　and　anti…religious　coalition　to　rob　Orbajosa　of　its　treasures；　its　faith；　and　its　maidens。　I　am　sure　that　your　sister　firmly　believes　that　I　am　going　to　take　her　house　by　assault；　and　there　is　not　a　doubt　but　that　behind　the　door　some　barricade　has　been　erected。

〃But　it　could　not　be　otherwise。　Here　they　have　the　most　antiquated　ideas　respecting　society；　religion；　the　state；　property。　The　religious　exaltation　which　impels　them　to　employ　force　against　the　Government；　to　defend　a　faith　which　no　one　has　attacked；　and　which；　besides；　they　do　not　possess；　revives　in　their　mind　the　feudal　sentiment；　and　as　they　would　settle　every　question　by　brute　force；　with　the　sword　and　with　fire；　killing　all　who　do　not　think　as　they　do；　they　believe　that　no　one　in　the　world　employs　other　methods。

〃Far　from　intending　to　perform　quixotic　deeds　in　this　lady's　house；　I　have　in　reality　saved　her　some　annoyances　from　which　the　rest　of　the　town　have　not　escaped。　Owing　to　my　friendship　with　the　brigadier　she　has　not　been　obliged　to　present；　as　was　ordered；　a　list　of　those　of　the　men　in　her　service　who　have　joined　the　insurgents；　and　if　her　house　was　searched　I　have　certain　knowledge　that　it　was　only　for　form's　sake；　and　if　the　six　men　there　were　disarmed；　they　have　been　replaced　by　six　others；　and　nothing　has　been　done　to　her。　You　see　to　what　my　hostility　to　that　lady　is　reduced。

〃It　is　true　that　I　have　the　support　of　the　military　chiefs；　but　I　make　use　of　it　solely　to　escape　being　insulted　or　ill…used　by　these　implacable　people。　The　probabilities　of　my　success　consist　in　the　fact　that　the　authorities　recently　appointed　by　the　commander　of　the　brigade　are　all　my　friends。　I　derive　from　them　the　moral　force　which　enables　me　to　intimidate　these　people。　I　don't　know　whether　I　shall　find　myself　compelled　to　commit　some　violent　action；　but　don't　be　alarmed；　for　the　assault　and　the　taking　of　the　house　is　altogether　a　wild；　feudal　idea　of　your　sister。　Chance　has　placed　me　in　an　advantageous　position。　Rage；　the　passion　that　burns　within　me；　will　impel　me　to　profit　by　it。　I　don't　know　how　far　I　may　go。〃



〃APRIL　17。

〃Your　letter　has　given　me　great　consolation。　Yes；　I　can　attain　my　object；　employing　only　the　resources　of　the　law；　which　will　be　completely　effectual　for　it。　I　have　consulted　the　authorities　of　this　place；　and　they　all　approve　of　the　course　you　indicate。　I　am　very　glad　of　it。　Since　I　have　put　into　my　cousin's　mind　the　idea　of　disobedience；　let　it　at　least　be　under　the　protection　of　the　law。　I　will　do　what　you　bid　me；　that　is　to　say　I　will　renounce　the　somewhat　unworthy　collaboration　of　Pinzon；　I　will　break　up　the　terrorizing　solidarity　which　I　established　with　the　soldiers；　I　will　cease　to　make　a　display　of　the　power　I　derived　from　them；　I　will　have　done　with　adventures；　and　at　the　fitting　moment　I　will　act　with　calmness；　prudence；　and　all　the　benignity　possible。　It　is　better　so。　My　coalition；　half…serious；　half…　jesting；　with　the　army；　had　for　its　object　to　protect　me　against　the　violence　of　the　Orbajosans　and　of　the　servants　and　the　relations　of　my　aunt。　For　the　rest；　I　have　always　disapproved　of　the　idea　of　what　we　call　armed　intervention。

〃The　friend　who　aided　me　has　been　obliged　to　leave　the　house；　but　I　am　not　entirely　cut　off　from　communication　with　my　cousin。　The　poor　girl　shows　heroic　valor　in　the　midst　of　her　sufferings；　and　will　obey　me　blindly。

〃Set　your　mind　at　rest　about　my　personal　safety。　For　my　part；　I　have　no　fear　and　I　am　quite　tranquil。〃



〃APRIL　20。

〃To…day　I　can　write　only　a　few　lines。　I　have　a　great　deal　to　do。　All　will　be　ended　within　two　or　three　days。　Don't　write　to　me　again　to　this　miserable　town。　I　shall　soon　have　the　happiness　of　embracing　you。


〃PEPE。〃



CHAPTER　XXIX

FROM　PEPE　REY　TO　ROSARITO　POLENTINOS

〃Give　Estebanillo　the　key　of　the　garden　and　charge　him　to　take　care　about　the　dog。　The　boy　is　mine；　body　and　soul。　Fear　nothing！　I　shall　be　very　sorry　if　you　cannot　come　down　stairs　as　you　did　the　other　night。　Do　all　you　can　to　manage　it。　I　will　be　in　the　garden　a　little　after　midnight。　I　will　then　tell　you　what　course　I　have　decided　upon；　and　what　you　are　to　do。　Tranquillize　your　mind；　my　dear　girl；　for　I　have　abandoned　all　imprudent　or　violent　expedients。　I　will　tell　you　every　thing　when　I　see　you。　There　is　much　to　tell；　and　it　must　be　spoken；　not　written。　I　can　picture　to　myself　your　terror　and　anxiety　at　the　thought　of　my　being　so　near　you。　But　it　is　a　week　since　I　have　seen　you。　I　have　sworn　that　this　separation　from　you　shall　soon　be　ended；　and　it　will　be　ended。　My　heart　tells　me　that　I　shall　see　you。　I　swear　that　I　will　see　you。〃



CHAPTER　XXX

BEATING　UP　THE　GAME

A　man　and　a　woman　entered　the　hotel　of　the　widow　De　Cuzco　a　little　after　ten　o'clock；　and　left　it　at　half…past　eleven。

〃Now；　Senora　Dona　Maria；〃　said　the　man；　〃I　will　take　you　to　your　house；　for　I　have　something　to　do。〃

〃Wait；　Senor　Ramos；　for　the　love　of　God！〃　she　answered。　〃Why　don't　we　go　to　the　Casino　to　see　if　he　comes　out？　You　heard　just　now　that　Estebanillo；　the　boy　that　works　in　the　garden；　was　talking　with　him　this　afternoon。〃

〃But　are　you　looking　for　Don　Jose？〃　asked　the　Centaur；　with　ill…humor。　〃What　have　we　to　do　with　him？　The　courtship　with　Dona　Rosario　ended　as　it　was　bound　to　end；　and　now　there　is　nothing　for　it　but　for　my　mother　to　marry　them。　That　is　my　opinion。〃

〃You　are　a　fool！〃　said　Remedios　angrily。

〃Senora；　I　am　going。〃

〃Why；　you　rude　man；　are　you　going　to　leave　me　alone　in　the　street？〃

〃Yes；　senora；　unless　you　go　home　at　once。〃

〃That's　rightleave　me　alone；　exposed　to　be　insulted！　Listen　to　me；　Senor　Ramos。　Don　Jose　will　come　out　of　the　Casino　in　a　moment；　as　usual。　I　want　to　see　whether　he　goes　into　his　hot