a face illumined-第50章

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deepening　twilight；　and　saw　the　young　people　enter　a　confectionery

shop；　but　observed；　with　increased　uneasiness；　that　Miss　Mayhew

parted　from　them　and　went　to　an　adjacent　drug…store。　　She　soon

joined　the　party　again；　however；　and　they　all　apparently　started

homeward。



Van　Berg　at　once　determined　to　go　to　this　drug…store　and　learn；　if

possible；　if　there　were　anything　to　confirm　the　horrible　suspicion

that　crossed　his　mind。　　He　remembered　that　despair　and　desperate

deeds　often　went　together；　and　the　daily　press　had　taught　him　how

many　people；　with　warped　and　ungoverned　moral　natures；　place　their

troubles　beyond　remedy　by　the　supreme　folly　of　self…destruction。



By　a　considerable　detour　through　a　side　street；　he　reached　the

store　unperceived；　and　found　the　druggist　rather　disquieted　himself。



〃Are　you　staying　at　Burleigh's？〃　he　asked。



〃I　am；〃　Van　Berg　replied。



〃Do　you　know　a　young　lady　boarding　there　with　large　dark　eyes　and

auburn　hair？〃



〃I　do。〃



〃Is　thereis　there　anything　wrong　about　her？〃



〃Why　should　there　be？　　Why　do　you　ask？〃



〃She　has　just　been　in　here；　and　she　looked　sick　and　strangely；　and

all　she　wanted　was　a　large　phial　of　laudanum。　　Somehow　her　looks

and　purchase　have　made　me　uneasy。　　I　never　saw　so　white　a　face　in

my　life；　and　she　seemed　weak　and　very　tired。　　If　she's　sick；　how

comes　it　she's　walking　to　the　village？　　Besides；　she　seemed　to　have

very　little　to　do　with　the　party　she　joined　after　leaving　here。〃



Van　Berg　controlled　himself　only　by　a　powerful　effort；　and　was　very

glad　that　the　brim　of　his　soft　hat　concealed　the　pallor　of　his　own

face。　　He　managed　to　say　quietly：



〃The　young　lady　you　describe　has　not　been　well；　and　has　probably

found　the　walk　longer　and　more　wearisome　than　she　supposed。　　As

for　the　laudanum；　that's　used　in　many　ways。　　Some　cigars；　if　you

pleasethank　you。　　I'll　join　the　lady　and　see　that　she　reaches　home

safely；〃　and　he　hastily　left　the　store　and　walked　swiftly　away。



〃He　wouldn't　go　as　fast　as　that　if　he　wasn't　a　little　uneasy；　too；〃

muttered　the　druggist；　whose　dearth　of　business　gave　him　abundant

leisure　to　see　all　that　was　going　on；　and　to　imagine　much　more。



Van　Berg　determined　to　overtake　Ida　before　she　reached　the　hotel；

and　his　strides　were　as　long　and　swift　as　mortal　dread　could　make

them。



In　the　meantime；　while　the　artist　was　making　the　detour　necessary

to　reach　the　drug…store　without　meeting　Ida；　she　and　her　companions

had　started　homeward。　　As　they　approached　a　church　on　the　outskirts

of　the　village；　the　bell　in　the　steeple　commenced　tolling。



〃What's　that　for？〃　asked　a　young　man　of　the　party　of　a　plain；

farmer…like　appearing　man；　who　was　just　about　to　enter。



〃For　prayer…meetin'；〃　was　the　good…natured　reply。　　〃It　wouldn't

hurt　you　to　come　to　it；〃　and　the　speaker　passed　into　the　lecture…room。



〃I　call　this　frivolous　assemblage　to　order；〃　cried　the　youth；

turning　around　to　his　companions。　　〃If　any　one　of　our　number　has

ever　attended　a　prayer…meeting；　let　him　hold　up　his　right　hand。

I　use　the　masculine　pronoun；　because　the　man　always　embraces　the

womanwhen　he　gets　a　chance。〃



No　hands　were　held　up。



〃Heathen；　every　mother's　son　of　us；〃　cried　the　first　speaker。

〃The　daughters　are　angels；　of　course；　and　don't　need　to　go　to

prayer…meetin'；　as　he　of　the　cowhide　sandals　just　termed　it。　　But

for　the　novelty　of　the　thing；　and　for　the　want　of　something　better

to　do；　I　move　that　we　all　go　to…night。　　If　it　should　be　borous；

why；　we　can　come　out。〃



The　proposition　pleased　the　fancy　of　the　party；　and　with　gay　words

and　laughter　that　scarcely　ceased　at　the　vestibule；　they　entered

the　place　of　prayer　and　lighted　down　among　the　sober…visaged；

soberly…dressed　worshippers　like　a　flock　of　tropical　birds。



Ida　reluctantly　followed　them。　　At　first　she　half　decided　to　walk

home　alone；　but　feared　to　do　so。　　She　who　had　resolved　on　facing

the　〃King　of　Terrors〃　shrank；　with　a　woman's　instinct；　from　a　lonely

walk　in　the　starlight。



She　sat　in　dreary　preoccupation　a　little　apart　from　the　others　and

paid　no　more　heed　to　the　opening　services　than　to　their　ill…concealed

merriment。



the　minister　was　away　on　his　August　vacation。　　Prayer…meetings

were　out　of　season；　and　very　few　were　present。　　The　plain　farmer

was　trying　to　conduct　the　service　as　well　as　he　could；　but　it　was

evident　he　would　have　been　much　more　at　ease　holding　the　handle　of

a　plow　or　the　reins　of　his　rattling　team；　than　a　hymn…book。　　Dr。

Watts　and　John　Wesley　might　have　lost　some　of　their　heavenly　serenity

could　they　have　heard　him　read　their　verses；　and　certainly　only　a

long…suffering　and　merciful　God　could　listen　to　his　prayer。　　And

yet　rarely　on　the　battle…field　is　there　more　moral　courage　displayed

than　plain　Thomas　Smith　put　forth　that　night　in　his　conscientious

effort　to　perform　an　unwonted　task；　and　when　at　last　he　sat　down

and　said；　〃Bruthren；　the　meetin'　is　now　open；〃　he　was　more　exhausted

than　he　than　he　would　have　been　from　a　long　day　of　toil。



〃The　Lord　looketh　at　the　heart〃　is　a　truth　that　chills　many　with

dread；　but　it　was　a　precious　thought　to　Farmer　Smith　as　he　saw　that

his　fellow　church　members　did　not　look　very　appreciative；　and　that

the　gay　young　city…people　often　giggled　outright　at　his　uncouth

words　and　manner。



Ida　would　have　been　as　greatly　amused　as　any　of　them　a　few　weeks

since；　but　now　she　scarcely　heard　the　poor　man's　stumblings；　or

the　wailing　of　the　hymns　that　were　mangled　anew　by　the　people。　　She

sat　with　her　eyes　fixed　on　vacancy；　thinking　how　dreary　and　empty

the　world　had　become；　and　it　seemed　to　her　that　religion　was　the

most　dreary　and　empty　thing　in　it。



〃What　good　can　this　wretched　little　meeting　do　any　one？〃　she　thought；

more　than　once。



She　was　answered。



Near　her　was　a　very　old　man　who　had　been　regarding　the　ill…behaved

party　with　an　expression　of　mingled　displeasure　and　pity。　　Now　that

the　meeting　was　open　to　all　he　rose　slowly　to　his　feet；　steadying

himself　with　his　cane。



〃He　looks　like　the　Ancient　Mariner；〃　giggled　an　exceedingly　immature

youth；　who　sat　next　to　Ida。



She　turned　upon　him　sharply　and　said；　in　a　low　tone；　〃If　you　have

the　faintest　instincts　of　a　gentleman　you　will　respect　that　venerable

man。〃



The　youth　was　so　effectually　quenched　that　he　bore　the　aspect　of

a　turnip…beet　during　the　remainder　of　the　service。



〃My　young　friends；〃　began　the　old　main　in　tones　of　gentle　dignity；

〃will　you　listen　patiently　and　quietly　to　one　that　you　see　will

not　have　the　chance　to　speak　many　more　words。　　My　eyes　are　a　little

dim；　but　you　all　appear　young　and　happy；　and　yet　I　am　sorry　for

you；　very　sorry　for　you。　　You　don't　realize　what　you　are　and　what

is　before　you。　　You　remind　me　of　a　number　of　pleasure　boats　just

starting　out　to　sea。　　I　have　been　across　this　ocean；　and　have　almost

reached　the　other　shore。　　I　know　what　terrible　storms　and　dangers

you　will　meet。　　You　can't　escape　these　storms；　my　young　friends。

No　one　can；　and　you　don't　seem　prepared　to　meet　them。



〃Your　manner　has　pained　me　very　much；　and　yet；　as　my　Master　said；

so　I　have　felt；　you　'know　not　what　you　do。'　　There　is　a　Kingly

Presence　in　this　place　that　you　have　not　recognized。　　Do　you　not

remember　who　it　was　that　said；　'Where　two　or　three　are　gathered

together　in　my　name；　there　am　I　in　the　midst　of　them'？



〃I　am　very　old；　but　my　memory　is　good。　　It　seems　but　a　short　time

ago　that　I　was　as　young　thoughtless　as　any　one　of　you；　and　yet　it

was　seventy　years　ago。　　I　have　tested　the　friendship　of　Jesus　Christ

for　over　half　a　century。　　Have　I　not　then　a　right　to　speak　of　it？

Ought　I　not　to　know　something　about　him？



〃Do　you　ask　me　if　my　Master　has　kept　me　from　trouble　and　suffering

all　these　years？　　Far　from　it。　　Indeed；　I　think　he　has　caused　me　a

good　deal　of　trouble　and　pain　in　addition　to　that　which　I　brought　on

myself　by　my　own　folly　and　mistakes；　but　I　now　see　that　he　caused

it　only　as　the　good　physician　gives　pain；　in　order　to　make　the

patient　strong　and　well。　　But　one　thing　is　certainly　true。　　He　has

stood　by　me　as　a　faithful　friend　all　these　years；　and　has　brought

good　to　me　out　of　all　the　evil。　　I　have　been　in　sore　temptations

and　deep　discouragement。　　My　heart　at　times　has　seemed　breaking

with　sorrow。　　Mine　has　been　the　common　lot。　　But　when　the　storm　was

loudest　and　most　terrible；　his　hand　was　on　the　helm；　and　now　I　am

entering　the　quiet　harbor。　　There　has　been　much　that　was　dark　and

hard　to　understand；　there　is　much　still；　but　there　is　plenty　to

prove　that　my　Heavenly　Father　is　leading　me　home　as　a　little　child。



〃It　is　a　precious；　blessed　truth　that　I　wish　to　bring　you　fact　to

face　with　to…night；　and　yet　it　may　become　a　very　sad　and　terrible

truth；　if　you　shut　your　eyes　to　it　now　and　remember　it　only　when

it　is　too　late。　　I　wish　to　assure　you；　on　the　ground　of　simple；

down…right　experience；　through　all　these　years；　that　God's　'unspeakable

gift；'　his　only　Son；　is　just　what　our　poor　human　nature　needs。

Jesus　Christ　'is　able　to　save　them　ot　the　uttermost　that　come　to

God　by　him。'　　He　helps　us　overcome　that　awful　diseasesin。　　He

brings　to　our　unhappy　hearts　immortal　life　and　health。　　I　know　it

as　I　know　that　I　exist。　　He　has　helped　me　when　and　where　there　was

no　human　help。　　I　have　often　seen　his　redeeming　work　in　the　lives

of　other　faulty；　sinful　people　like　myself。



〃The　question　therefore　which　you　must　each　decide　is　not　whether

you　will　believe　this　or　that　doctrine；　or　do　what　this　or　that

man　teaches。　　The　question　is　this：Here　is　a　tender；　merciful；

Divine　Friend。　　He　offers　to　lead　you　safely　through　all　the　dangers

and　hard　places　in　this　world；　as　a　shepherd　leads　his　flock　through

the　wilderness。　　Will　you　follow　him；　or　will　you　remain　in　the

wilderness　and　perish　when　the　night　comes；　as　it　surely　will？　　If

you　will　follow　him　as　well　as　you　can；　he'll　bring　you　to　a　happy

and　eternal　home。　　Thanks　to　his　patient　kindness　which　never

falters；　he　has　brough　me　almost　there。



〃And　now；　my　young　friends；　beat　with　an　old　man；　and　let　me　say；

in　conclusion；　that　you　all　need　the　kind；　patient；　faithful　Friend

that　I　found　so　long　ago。　　No　evil；　no　misfortune　can　come　into　any

human　life　that　is　beyond　his　power　to　remedy　and　finally　banish

forever。　　I　you　have　not　found　this　Friend；　this　Life…giver；　I　am

younger　and　happier　than　you　are　to…day；　although　I　am　eighty…eight

years　old。〃



Once　before　a　rash；　despairing　man　lifted　his　hand　against　his　life；

but　God's　message　to　him；　through　his　apostle；　was；　〃Do　thyself　no

harm。〃　　And　now　again　a　faithful　servant；　speaking　for　him　whose

coming　was　God's　supreme　expression　of　good…will　towards　men；　had

brought　a　like　merciful　message　to　another　poor　soul　that　had　taken

counsel　of　despair。　　Ida　Mayhew　might　learn；　as　did　the　jailer　of

Philippi；　that　God　has　a　bet