bleak house(凄凉的房子)-第142章
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everything； this airy dispensing with all principle and purpose； at
his elbow。 I thought I could understand how such a nature as my
Guardian’s； experienced in the world； and forced to contemplate
the miserable evasions and contentions of the family misfortune；
found an immense relief in Mr Skimpole’s avowal of his
weaknesses and display of guileless candour； but I could not
satisfy myself that it was as artless as it seemed； or that it did not
serve Mr Skimpole’s idle turn quite as well as any other part； and
with less trouble。
They both walked back with me； and Mr Skimpole leaving us at
the gate； I walked softly in with Richard； and said； “Ada； my love； I
have brought a gentleman to visit you。” It was not difficult to read
the blushing； startled face。 She loved him dearly； and he knew it；
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and I knew it。 It was a very transparent business； that meeting as
cousins only。
I almost mistrusted myself； as growing quite wicked in my
suspicions； but I was not so sure that Richard loved her dearly。 He
admired her very much—any one must have done that—and I
dare say； would have renewed their youthful engagement with
great pride and ardour； but that he knew how she would respect
her promise to my Guardian。 Still； I had a tormenting idea that the
influence upon him extended even here； that he was postponing
his best truth and earnestness； in this as in all things； until
Jarndyce and Jarndyce should be off his mind。 Ah me！ what
Richard would have been without that blight I never shall know
now！
He told Ada； in his most ingenuous way； that he had not come
to make any secret inroad on the terms she had accepted （rather
too implicitly and confidingly； he thought） from Mr Jarndyce； that
he had come openly to see her； and to see me； and to justify
himself for the present terms on which he stood with Mr Jarndyce。
As the dear old infant would be with us directly； he begged that I
would make an appointment for the morning； when he might set
himself right； through the means of an unreserved conversation
with me。 I proposed to walk with him in the park at seven o’clock；
and this was arranged。 Mr Skimpole soon afterwards appeared；
and made us merry for an hour。 He particularly requested to see
Little Coavinses （meaning Charley）； and told her； with a
patriarchal air； that he had given her late father all the business in
his power； and that if one of her little brothers would make haste
to get set…up in the same profession； he hoped he should still be
able to put a good deal of employment in his way。
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“For I am constantly being taken in these nets；” said Mr
Skimpole； looking beamingly at us over a glass of wine…and…water；
“and am constantly being bailed out—like a boat。 Or paid off—like
a ship’s company。 Somebody always does it for me。 I can’t do it；
you know； for I never have any money。 But Somebody does it。 I
get out by Somebody’s means； I am not like the starling； I get out。
If you were to ask me who Somebody is； upon my word I couldn’t
tell you。 Let us drink to Somebody。 God bless him！”
Richard was a little late in the morning； but I had not to wait for
him long； and we turned into the park。 The air was bright and
dewy； and the sky without a cloud。 The birds sang delightfully； the
sparkles in the fern； the grass； and trees； were exquisite to see； the
richness of the woods seemed to have increased twenty…fold since
yesterday； as if in the still night when they had looked so massively
hushed in sleep； Nature； through all the minute details of every
wonderful leaf； had been more wakeful than usual for the glory of
that day。
“This is a lovely place；” said Richard； looking round。 “None of
the jar and discord of law…suits here！”
But there was other trouble。
“I tell you what； my dear girl；” said Richard； “when I get affairs
in general settled； I shall come down here； I think； and rest。”
“Would it not be better to rest now？” I asked。
“Oh； as to resting now；” said Richard； “or as to doing anything
very definite now； that’s not easy。 In short it can’t be done； I can’t
do it at least。”
“Why not？” said I。
“You know why not； Esther。 If you were living in an unfinished
house； liable to have the roof put on or taken off—to be from top to
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bottom pulled down or built up—tomorrow； next day； next week；
next month； next year—you would find it hard to rest or settle。 So
do I。 Now？ There’s no now for us suitors。”
I could almost have believed in the attraction on which my poor
little wandering friend had expatiated； when I saw again the
darkened look of last night。 Terrible to think； it had in it also； a
shade of that unfortunate man who had died。
“My dear Richard；” said I； “this is a bad beginning of our
conversation。”
“I knew you would tell me so； Dame Durden。”
“And not I alone； dear Richard。 It was not I who cautioned you
once； never to found a hope or expectation on the family curse。”
“There you come back to John Jarndyce！” said Richard；
impatiently。 “Well！ We must approach him sooner or later； for he
is the staple of what I have to say： and it’s as well at once。 My dear
Esther； how can you be so blind？ Don’t you see that he is an
interested party； and that it may be very well for him to wish me to
know nothing of the suit； and care nothing about it； but that it may
not be quite so well for me？”
“O Richard；” I remonstrated； “is it possible that you can ever
have seen him and heard him； that you can ever have lived under
his roof and known him； and can yet breathe； even to me in this
solitary place where there is no one to hear us； such unworthy
suspicions？”
He reddened deeply； as if his natural generosity felt a pang of
reproach。 He was silent for a little while； before he replied in a
subdued voice：
“Esther； I am sure you know that I am not a mean fellow； and
that I have some sense of suspicion and distrust being poor
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qualities in one of my years。”
“I know it very well；” said I。 “I am not more sure of anything。”
“That’s a dear girl！” retorted Richard； “and like you； because it
gives me comfort。 I had need to get some scrap of comfort out of
all this business； for it’s a bad one at the best； as I have no occasion
to tell you。”
“I know perfectly；” said I； “I know as well； Richard—what shall
I say？ as well as you do—that such misconstructions are foreign to
your nature。 And I know； as well as you know； what so changes it。”
“Come； sister； come；” said Richard； a little more gaily； “you will
be fair with me at all events。 If I have the misfortune to be under
that influence； so has he。 If it has a little twisted me； it may have a
little twisted him； too。 I don’t say that he is not an honourable
man； out of all this complication and uncertainty； I am sure he is。
But it taints everybody。 You know it taints everybody。 You have
heard him say so fifty times。 Then why should he escape？”
“Because；” said I； “his is an uncommon character； and he has
resolutely kept himself outside the circle； Richard。”
“Oh； because and because！” replied Richard； in his vivacious
way。 “I am not sure； my dear girl； but that it may be wise and
specious to preserve that outward indifference。 It may cause other
parties interested to become lax about their interests； and people
may die off； and points may drag themselves out of memory； and
many things may smoothly happen that are convenient enough。”
I was so touched with pity for Richard； that I could not
reproach him any more； even by a look。 I remembered my
Guardian’s gentleness towards his errors； and with what perfect
freedom from resentment he had spoken of them。
“Esther；” Richard resumed； “you are not to suppose that I have
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come here to make under…handed charges against John Jarndyce。
I have only come to justify myself。 What I say is； it was all very
well； and we got on very well； while I was a boy； utterly regardless
of this same suit； but as soon as I began to take an interest in it；
and to look into it； then it was quite another thing。 Then John
Jarndyce discovers that Ada and I must break off； and that if I
don’t amend that very objectionable course； I am not fit for her。
Now； Esther； I don’t mean to amend that very objectionable
course： I will not hold John Jarndyce’s favour on those unfair
terms of compromise； which he has no right to dictate。 Whether it
pleases him or displeases him； I must maintain my rights； and
Ada’s。 I have been thinking about it a good deal； and this is the
conclusion I have come to。”
Poor dear Richard！ He had indeed been thinking about it a
good deal。 His face； his voice； his manner； all showed that； too
pl
