the patchwork girl of oz-第29章

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〃All　right；〃　said　Scraps。　〃I'll　wait；　if　Diksey



isn't　too　long。〃







〃No；　he's　short；　he's　shorter　than　I　am。　Ha；



ha；　ha！　Say！　that's　a　better　joke　than　Diksey's。



He　won't　be　too　long；　because　he's　short。　Hee；



hee；　ho！〃







The　other　Horners　who　were　standing　by　roared



with　laughter　and　seemed　to　like　their　Chief's



joke　as　much　as　he　did。　Scraps　thought　it　was　odd



that　they　could　be　so　easily　amused；　but　decided



there　could　be　little　harm　in　people　who　laughed



so　merrily。



















Chapter　Twenty…Three







Peace　Is　Declared











〃Come　with　me　to　my　dwelling　and　I'll　introduce



you　to　my　daughters；〃　said　the　Chief。　〃We're



bringing　them　up　according　to　a　book　of　rules　that



was　written　by　one　of　our　leading　old　bachelors；



and　everyone　says　they're　a　remarkable　lot　of　girls。〃







So　Scraps　accompanied　him　along　the　street　to　a



house　that　seemed　on　the　outside　exceptionally



grimy　and　dingy。　The　streets　of　this　city　were　not



paved　nor　had　any　attempt　been　made　to　beautify



the　houses　or　their　surroundings；　and　having



noticed　this　condition　Scraps　was　astonished　when



the　Chief　ushered　her　into　his　home。







Here　was　nothing　grimy　or　faded；　indeed。　On　the



contrary；　the　room　was　of　dazzling　brilliance　and



beauty；　for　it　was　lined　throughout　with　an



exquisite　metal　that　resembled　translucent　frosted



silver。　The　surface　of　this　metal　was　highly



ornamented　in　raised　designs　representing　men；



animals；　flowers　and　trees；　and　from　the　metal



itself　was　radiated　the　soft　light　which　flooded



the　room。　All　the　furniture　was　made　of　the　same



glorious　metal；　and　Scraps　asked　what　it　was。







〃That's　radium；〃　answered　the　Chief。　〃We



Horners　spend　all　our　time　digging　radium　from



the　mines　under　this　mountain；　and　we　use　it



to　decorate　our　homes　and　make　them　pretty　and



cosy。　It　is　a　medicine；　too；　and　no　one　can　ever



be　sick　who　lives　near　radium。〃







〃Have　you　plenty　of　it？〃　asked　the　Patchwork



Girl。







〃More　than　we　can　use。　All　the　houses　in　this



city　are　decorated　with　it；　just　the　same　as　mine



is。〃







don't　you　use　it　on　your　streets；　then；



and　the　outside　of　your　houses；　to　make　them　as



pretty　as　they　are　within？〃　she　inquired。







〃Outside？　Who　cares　for　the　outside　of



anything？〃　asked　the　Chief。　〃We　Horners　don't　live



on　the　outside　of　our　homes；　we　live　inside。　Many



people　are　like　those　stupid　Hoppers；　who　love　to



make　an　outside　show。　I　suppose　you　strangers



thought　their　city　more　beautiful　than　ours；



because　you　judged　from　appearances　and　they　have



handsome　marble　houses　and　marble　streets；　but　if



you　entered　one　of　their　stiff　dwellings　you　would



find　it　bare　and　uncomfortable；　as　all　their　show



is　on　the　outside。　They　have　an　idea　that　what　is



not　seen　by　others　is　not　important；　but　with　us



the　rooms　we　live　in　are　our　chief　delight　and



care；　and　we　pay　no　attention　to　outside　show。〃







〃Seems　to　me；〃　said　Scraps；　musingly；　〃it



would　be　better　to　make　it　all　prettyinside



and　out。〃







〃Seems？　Why；　you're　all　seams；　my　girl！〃　said



the　Chief；　and　then　he　laughed　heartily　at　his



latest　joke　and　a　chorus　of　small　voices　echoed



the　chorus　with　〃tee…hee…hee！　ha；　ha！〃







Scraps　turned　around　and　found　a　row　of



girls　seated　in　radium　chairs　ranged　along　one



wall　of　the　room。　There　were　nineteen　of　them；



by　actual　count；　and　they　were　of　all　sizes　from



a　tiny　child　to　one　almost　a　grown　woman。　All



were　neatly　dressed　in　spotless　white　robes　and



had　brown　skins；　horns　on　their　foreheads　and



threecolored　hair。







〃These；〃　said　the　Chief；　〃are　my　sweet



daughters。　My　dears；　I　introduce　to　you　Miss



Scraps　Patchwork；　a　lady　who　is　traveling　in



foreign　parts　to　increase　her　store　of　wisdom。〃







The　nineteen　Horner　girls　all　arose　and　made



a　polite　curtsey；　after　which　they　resumed　their



seats　and　rearranged　their　robes　properly。







〃Why　do　they　sit　so　still；　and　all　in　a　row？〃



asked　Scraps。







〃Because　it　is　ladylike　and　proper；〃　replied　the



Chief。







〃But　some　are　just　children；　poor　things！



Don't　they　ever　run　around　and　play　and　laugh；



and　have　a　good　time？〃







〃No；　indeed；〃　said　the　Chief。　〃That　would　he



improper　in　young　ladies；　as　well　as　in　those　who



will　sometime　become　young　ladies。　My　daughters



are　being　brought　up　according　to　the　rules　and



regulations　laid　down　by　a　leading　bachelor　who



has　given　the　subject　much　study　and　is　himself　a



man　of　taste　and　culture。　Politeness　is　his　great



hobby；　and　he　claims　that　if　a　child　is　allowed　to



do　an　impolite　thing　one　cannot　expect　the　grown



person　to　do　anything　better。〃







〃Is　it　impolite　to　romp　and　shout　and　be　jolly？〃



asked　Scraps。







〃Well；　sometimes　it　is；　and　sometimes　it　isn't；〃



replied　the　Horner；　after　considering　the



question。　〃By　curbing　such　inclinations　in　my



daughters　we　keep　on　the　safe　side。　Once　in　a



while　I　make　a　good　joke；　as　you　have　heard；　and



then　I　permit　my　daughters　to　laugh　decorously；



but　they　are　never　allowed　to　make　a　joke



themselves。〃







〃That　old　bachelor　who　made　the　rules　ought



to　be　skinned　alive！〃　declared　Scraps；　and　would



have　said　more　on　the　subject　had　not　the　door



opened　to　admit　a　little　Horner　man　whom　the



Chief　introduced　as　Diksey。







〃What's　up；　Chief？〃　asked　Diksey；　winking



nineteen　times　at　the　nineteen　girls；　who　demurely



cast　down　their　eyes　because　their　father　was



looking。







The　Chief　told　the　man　that　his　joke　had　not



been　understood　by　the　dull　Hoppers；　who　had



become　so　angry　that　they　had　declared　war。　So　the



only　way　to　avoid　a　terrible　battle　was　to　explain



the　joke　so　they　could　understand　it。







〃All　right；〃　replied　Diksey；　who　seemed　a　good…



natured　man；　〃I'll　go　at　once　to　the　fence　and



explain。　I　don't　want　any　war　with　the　Hoppers；



for　wars　between　nations　always　cause　hard



feelings。〃







So　the　Chief　and　Diksey　and　Scraps　left　the



house　and　went　back　to　the　marble　picket　fence。



The　Scarecrow　was　still　stuck　on　the　top　of　his



picket　but　had　now　ceased　to　struggle。　On　the



other　side　of　the　fence　were　Dorothy　and　Ojo；



looking　between　the　pickets；　and　there；　also；



were　the　Champion　and　many　other　Hoppers。







Diksey　went　close　to　the　fence　and　said：







〃My　good　Hoppers；　I　wish　to　explain　that



what　I　said　about　you　was　a　joke。　You　have　but



one　leg　each；　and　we　have　two　legs　each。　Our



legs　are　under　us；　whether　one　or　two；　and　we



stand　on　them。　So；　when　I　said　you　had　less



understanding　than　we；　I　did　not　mean　that　you



had　less　understanding；　you　understand；　but



that　you　had　less　standundering；　so　to　speak。



Do　you　understand　that？〃







The　Hoppers　thought　it　over　carefully。　Then　one



said：







〃That　is　clear　enough；　but　where　does　the　joke



come　in？'〃







Dorothy　laughed；　for　she　couldn't　help　it；



although　all　the　others　were　solemn　enough。







〃I'll　tell　you　where　the　joke　comes　in；〃　she



said；　and　took　the　Hoppers　away　to　a　distance；



where　the　Horners　could　not　hear　them。　〃You　know；〃



she　then　explained；　〃those　neighbors　of　yours　are



not　very　bright；　poor　things；　and　what　they　think



is　a　joke　isn't　a　joke　at　allit's　true；　don't



you　see？〃







〃True　that　we　have　less　understanding？〃　asked



the　Champion。







〃Yes；　it's　true　because　you　don't　understand



such　a　poor　joke；　if　you　did；　you'd　be　no　wiser



than　they　are。〃







〃Ah；　yes；　of　course；〃　they　answered；　looking



very　wise。







〃So　I'll　tell　you　what　to　do；〃　continued



Dorothy。　〃Laugh　at　their　poor　joke　and　tell　'em



it's　pretty　good　for　a　Horner。　Then　they　won't



dare　say　you　have　less　understanding；　because　you



understand　as　much　as　they　do。〃







The　Hoppers　looked　at　one　another　questioningly



and　blinked　their　eyes　and　tried　to　think　what　it



all　meant；　but　they　couldn't　figure　it　out。







〃What　do　you　think；　Champion？〃　asked　one　of



them。







〃I　think　it　is　dangerous　to　think　of　this　thing



any　more　than　we　can　help；〃　he　replied。　〃Let　us　do



as　this　girl　says　and　laugh　with　the　Horners；　so



as　to　make　them　believe　we　see　the　joke。　Then



there　will　be　peace　again　and　no　need　to　fight。〃







They　readily　agreed　to　this　and　returned　to



the　fence　laughing　as　loud　and　as　hard　as　they



could；　although　they　didn't　feel　like　laughing



a　bit。　The　Horners　were　much　surprised。







〃That's　a　fine　jokefor　a　Hornerand　we　are



much　pleased　with　it；〃　said　the　Champion；　speaking



between　the　pickets。　〃But　please　don't　do　it



again。〃







〃I　won't；〃　promised　Diksey。　〃If　I　think　of



another　such　joke　I'll　try　to　forget　it。〃







〃Good！〃　cried　the　Chief　Horner。　〃The　war　is　over



and　peace　is　declared。〃







There　was　much　joyful　shouting　on　both　sides　of



the　fence　and　the　gate　was　unlocked　and　thrown



wide　open；　so　that　Scraps　was　able　to　rejoin　her



friends。







〃What　about　the　Scarecrow？〃　she　asked　Dorothy。







〃We　must　get　him　down；　somehow　or　other；〃　was



the　reply。







〃Perhaps　the　Horners　can　find　a　way；〃　suggested



Ojo。　So　they　all　went　through　the　gate　and　Dorothy



asked　the　Chief　Horner　how　they　could　get　the



Scarecrow　off　the　fence。　The　Chief　didn't　know



how；　but　Diksey　said：







〃A　ladder's　the　thing。〃







〃Have　you　one？〃　asked　Dorothy。







〃To　be　sure。　We　use　ladders　in　our　mines；〃



said　he。　Then　he　ran　away　to　get　the　ladder；



and　while　he　was　gone　the　Horners　gathered



around　and　welcomed　the　strangers　to　their



country；　for　through　them　a　great　war　had　been



avoided。







In　a　little　while　Diksey　came　back　with　a



tall　ladder　which　he　placed　against　the　fence。　Ojo



at　once　climbed　to　the　top　of　the　ladder　and



Dorothy　went　about　halfway　up　and　Scraps　stood　at



the　foot　of　it。　Toto　ran　around　it　and　barked。



Then　Ojo　pulled　the　Scarecrow　away　from　the　picket



and　passed　him　down　to　Dorothy；　who　in　turn



lowered　him　to　the　Patchwork　Girl。







A