the patchwork girl of oz-第9章

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Ojo。







〃Wait　a　minute；〃　cried　Scraps。　〃This　music



thing　interests　me。　I　remember　to　have　heard



music　when　I　first　came　to　life；　and　I　would　like



to　hear　it　again。　What　is　your　name；　my　poor



abused　phonograph？〃







〃Victor　Columbia　Edison；〃　it　answered。







〃Well；　I　shall　call　you　'Vic'　for　short；〃　said



the　Patchwork　Girl。　〃Go　ahead　and　play　something。〃







〃It'll　drive　you　crazy；〃　warned　the　cat。







〃I'm　crazy　now；　according　to　your　statement。



Loosen　up　and　reel　out　the　music；　Vic。〃







〃The　only　record　I　have　with　me；〃　explained



the　phonograph；　〃is　one　the　Magician　attached



just　before　we　had　our　quarrel。　It's　a　highly



classical　composition。〃







〃A　what？〃　inquired　Scraps。







〃It　is　classical　music；　and　is　considered　the



best　and　most　puzzling　ever　manufactured。



You're　supposed　to　like　it；　whether　you　do　or



not；　and　if　you　don't；　the　proper　thing　is　to　look



as　if　you　did。　Understand？〃







〃Not　in　the　least；〃　said　Scraps。







〃Then；　listen！〃







At　once　the　machine　began　to　play　and　in　a



few　minutes　Ojo　put　his　hands　to　his　ears　to



shut　out　the　sounds　and　the　cat　snarled　and



Scraps　began　to　Jaugh。







〃Cut　it　out；　Vic；〃　she　said。　〃That's　enough。〃







But　the　phonograph　continued　playing　the　dreary



tune；　so　Ojo　seized　the　crank；　jerked　it　free　and



threw　it　into　the　road。　However；　the　moment　the



crank　struck　the　ground　it　hounded　back　to　the



machine　again　and　began　winding　it　up。　And　still



the　music　played。







〃Let's　run！〃　cried　Scraps；　and　they　all　started



and　ran　down　the　path　as　fast　as　they　could　go。



But　the　phonograph　was　right　behind　them



and　could　run　and　play　at　the　same　time。　It



called　out；　reproachfully：







〃What's　the　matter？　Don't　you　love　classical



music？〃







〃No；　Vic；〃　said　Scraps；　halting。　〃We　will



passical　the　classical　and　preserve　what　joy　we



have　left。　I　haven't　any　nerves；　thank　goodness；



but　your　music　makes　my　cotton　shrink。〃







〃Then　turn　over　my　record。　There's　a　rag…time



tune　on　the　other　side；〃　said　the　machine。







〃What's　rag…time？〃







〃The　opposite　of　classical。〃







〃All　right；〃　said　Scraps；　and　turned　over　the



record。







The　phonograph　now　began　to　play　a　jerky　jumble



of　sounds　which　proved　so　bewildering　that　after　a



moment　Scraps　stuffed　her　patchwork　apron　into　the



gold　horn　and　cried：　〃Stopstop！　That's　the　other



extreme。　It's　extremely　bad！〃







Muffled　as　it　was；　the　phonograph　played　on。







〃If　you　don't　shut　off　that　music　I'll　smash



your　record；〃　threatened　Ojo。







The　music　stopped；　at　that；　and　the　machine



turned　its　horn　from　one　to　another　and　said



with　great　indignation：　　〃What's　the　matter



now？　Is　it　possible　you　can't　appreciate　rag…



time？〃







〃Scraps　ought　to；　being　rags　herself；〃　said



the　cat；　〃but　I　simply　can't　stand　it；　it　makes



my　whiskers　curl。〃







〃It　is；　indeed；　dreadful！〃　exclaimed　Ojo；　with



a　shudder。







〃It's　enough　to　drive　a　crazy　lady　mad；〃



murmured　the　Patchwork　Girl。　〃I'll　tell　you　what；



Vic；〃　she　added　as　she　smoothed　out　her　apron　and



put　it　on　again；　〃for　some　reason　or　other　you've



missed　your　guess。　You're　not　a　concert；　you're　a



nuisance。　〃







〃Music　hath　charms　to　soothe　the　savage



breast；〃　asserted　the　phonograph　sadly。







〃Then　we're　not　savages。　I　advise　you　to　go



home　and　beg　the　Magician's　pardon。〃







〃Never！　He'd　smash　me。〃







〃That's　what　we　shall　do；　if　you　stay　here；〃



Ojo　declared。







〃Run　along；　Vic；　and　bother　some　one　else；〃



advised　Scraps。　〃Find　some　one　who　is　real



wicked；　and　stay　with　him　till　he　repents。　In



that　way　you　can　do　some　good　in　the　world。〃







The　music　thing　turned　silently　away　and



trotted　down　a　side　path；　toward　a　distant



Munchkin　village。







〃Is　that　the　way　we　go？〃　asked　Bungle　anxiously。







〃No；〃　said　Ojo；　〃I　think　we　shall　keep　straight



ahead；　for　this　path　is　the　widest　and　best。



When　we　come　to　some　house　we　will　inquire



the　way　to　the　Emerald　City。〃



















Chapter　Eight







The　foolish　Owl　and　the　Wise　Donkey











On　they　went；　and　half　an　hour's　steady　walking



brought　them　to　a　house　somewhat　better　than　the



two　they　had　already　passed。　It　stood　close　to　the



roadside　and　over　the　door　was　a　sign　that　read：



〃Miss　Foolish　Owl　and　Mr。　Wise　Donkey：　　Public



Advisers。〃







When　Ojo　read　this　sign　aloud　Scraps　said



laughingly：　〃Well；　here　is　a　place　to　get　all　the



advice　we　want；　maybe　more　than　we　need。　Let's　go



in。〃







The　boy　knocked　at　the　door。







〃Come　in！〃　called　a　deep　bass　voice。







So　they　opened　the　door　and　entered　the　house；



where　a　little　light…brown　donkey；　dressed　in　a



blue　apron　and　a　blue　cap；　was　engaged　in　dusting



the　furniture　with　a　blue　cloth。　On　a　shelf　over



the　window　sat　a　great　blue　owl　with　a　blue



sunbonnet　on　her　head；　blinking　her　big　round



eyes　at　the　visitors。







〃Good　morning；〃　said　the　donkey；　in　his　deep



voice；　which　seemed　bigger　than　he　was。　〃Did



you　come　to　us　for　advice？〃







〃Why；　we　came；　anyhow；〃　replied　Scraps；　〃and　now



we　are　here　we　may　as　well　have　some　advice。　It's



free；　isn't　it？〃







〃Certainly；〃　said　the　donkey。　〃Advice　doesn't



cost　anythingunless　you　follow　it。　Permit　me　to



say；　by　the　way；　that　you　are　the　queerest　lot　of



travelers　that　ever　came　to　my　shop。　Judging　you



merely　by　appearances；　I　think　you'd　better　talk



to　the　Foolish　Owl　yonder。〃







They　turned　to　look　at　the　bird；　which　fluttered



its　wings　and　stared　back　at　them　with　its　big



eyes。







〃Hoot…ti…toot…ti…toot！〃　cried　the　owl。











〃Fiddle…cum…foo；



Howdy…do？



Riddle…cum；　tiddle…cum；



Too…ra…la…loo！〃











〃That　beats　your　poetry；　Scraps；〃　said　Ojo。







〃It's　just　nonsense！〃　declared　the　Glass　Cat。







〃But　it's　good　advice　for　the　foolish；〃　said



the　donkey；　admiringly。　〃Listen　to　my　partner；



and　you　can't　go　wrong。







Said　the　owl　in　a　grumbling　voice：











〃Patchwork　Girl　has　come　to　life；



No　one's　sweetheart；　no　one's　wife；



Lacking　sense　and　loving　fun；



She'll　be　snubbed　by　everyone。〃











〃Quite　a　compliment！　Quite　a　compliment；　I



declare；〃　exclaimed　the　donkey；　turning　to　look　at



Scraps。　〃You　are　certainly　a　wonder；　my　dear；　and



I　fancy　you'd　make　a　splendid　pincushion。　If　you



belonged　to　me；　I'd　wear　smoked　glasses　when　I



looked　at　you。〃







〃Why？〃　asked　the　Patchwork　Girl。







〃Because　you　are　so　gay　and　gaudy。〃







〃It　is　my　beauty　that　dazzles　you；〃　she



asserted。　〃You　Munchkin　people　all　strut　around　in



your　stupid　blue　color；　while　I〃







〃You　are　wrong　in　calling　me　a　Munchkin；〃



interrupted　the　donkey；　〃for　I　was　born　in　the



Land　of　Mo　and　came　to　visit　the　Land　of　Oz



on　the　day　it　was　shut　off　from　all　the　rest　of



the　world。　So　here　I　am　obliged　to　stay；　and　I



confess　it　is　a　very　pleasant　country　to　live　in。〃







〃Hoot…ti…toot！〃　cried　the　owl；







〃Ojo's　searching　for　a　charm；



'Cause　Unc　Nunkie's　come　to　harm。



Charms　are　scarce；　they're　hard　to　get；



Ojo's　got　a　job；　you　bet！〃











〃Is　the　owl　so　very　foolish？〃　asked　the　boy。







〃Extremely　so；〃　replied　the　donkey。　〃Notice　what



vulgar　expressions　she　uses。　But　I　admire　the　owl



for　the　reason　that　she　is　positively　foolish。



Owls　are　supposed　to　be　so　very　wise；　generally；



that　a　foolish　one　is　unusual；　and　you　perhaps



know　that　anything　or　anyone　unusual　is　sure　to　be



interesting　to　the　wise。〃







The　owl　flapped　its　wings　again；　muttering



these　words：











〃It's　hard　to　be　a　glassy　cat



No　cat　can　be　more　hard　than　that；



She's　so　transparent；　every　act



Is　clear　to　us；　and　that's　a　fact。〃











〃Have　you　noticed　my　pink　brains？〃　inquired



Bungle；　proudly。　〃You　can　see　'em　work。〃







〃Not　in　the　daytime；〃　said　the　donkey。　〃She



can't　see　very　well　by　day；　poor　thing。　But　her



advice　is　excellent。　I　advise　you　all　to　follow　it。〃







〃The　owl　hasn't　given　us　any　advice；　as　yet；〃



the　boy　declared。







〃No？　Then　what　do　you　call　all　those　sweet



poems？〃







〃Just　foolishness；〃　replied　Ojo。　〃Scraps　does



the　same　thing。〃







〃Foolishness！　Of　course！　To　be　sure！　The　Foolish



Owl　must　be　foolish　or　she　wouldn't　be　the　Foolish



Owl。　You　are　very　complimentary　to　my　partner；



indeed；〃　asserted　the　donkey；　rubbing　his　front



hoofs　together　as　if　highly　pleased。







〃The　sign　says　that　you　are　wise；〃　remarked



Scraps　to　the　donkey。　〃I　wish　you　would　prove　it。〃







〃With　great　pleasure；〃　returned　the　beast。



〃Put　me　to　the　test；　my　dear　Patches；　and　I'll



prove　my　wisdom　in　the　wink　of　an　eye。







〃What　is　the　best　way　to　get　to　the　Emerald



City？〃　asked　Ojo。







〃Walk；〃　said　the　donkey。







〃I　know；　but　what　road　shall　I　take？〃　was　the



boy's　next　question。







〃The　road　of　yellow　bricks；　of　course。　It　leads



directly　to　the　Emerald　City。〃







〃And　how　shall　we　find　the　road　of　yellow



bricks？〃







〃By　keeping　along　the　path　you　have　been



following。　You'll　come　to　the　yellow　bricks　pretty



soon；　and　you'll　know　them　when　you　see　them



because　they're　the　only　yellow　things　in　the



blue　country。〃







〃Thank　you；〃　said　the　boy。　〃At　last　you　have



told　me　something。〃







〃Is　that　the　extent　of　your　wisdom？〃　asked



Scraps。







〃No；〃　replied　the　donkey；　〃I　know　many



other　things；　but　they　wouldn't　interest　you。



So　I'll　give　you　a　last　word　of　advice：　move　on；



for　the　sooner　you　do　that　the　sooner　you'll



get　to　the　Emerald　City　of　Oz。〃







〃Hoot…ti…toot…ti…toot…ti…too！〃　screeched　the　owl；











〃Off　you　go！　fast　or　slow；



Where　you're　going　you　don't　know。



Patches；　Bungle；　Muchkin　lad；



Facing　fortunes　good　and　bad；



Meeting　dangers　grave　and　sad；



Sometimes　worried；　sometimes　glad