how tell a story and others-第2章

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find　it　the　most　troublesome　and　aggravating　and　uncertain　thing　you　ever
undertook。







MENTAL　TELEGRAPHY　AGAIN

I　have　three　or　four　curious　incidents　to　tell　about。　　They　seem　to　come
under　the　head　of　what　I　named　〃Mental　Telegraphy〃　in　a　paper　written
seventeen　years　ago；　and　published　long　afterwards。　＇The　paper　entitled
〃Mental　Telegraphy；〃　which　originally　appeared　in　Harper's　Magazine　for
December；　1893；　is　included　in　the　volume　entitled　The　American　Claimant
and　Other　Stories　and　Sketches。＇

Several　years　ago　I　made　a　campaign　on　the　platform　with　Mr。　George　W。
Cable。　　In　Montreal　we　were　honored　with　a　reception。　　It　began　at　two　in
the　afternoon　in　a　long　drawing…room　in　the　Windsor　Hotel。　　Mr。　Cable　and
I　stood　at　one　end　of　this　room；　and　the　ladies　and　gentlemen　entered　it
at　the　other　end；　crossed　it　at　that　end；　then　came　up　the　long　left…hand
side；　shook　hands　with　us；　said　a　word　or　two；　and　passed　on；　in　the
usual　way。　　My　sight　is　of　the　telescopic　sort；　and　I　presently
recognized　a　familiar　face　among　the　throng　of　strangers　drifting　in　at
the　distant　door；　and　I　said　to　myself；　with　surprise　and　high
gratification；　〃That　is　Mrs。　R。；　I　had　forgotten　that　she　was　a
Canadian。〃　　She　had　been　a　great　friend　of　mine　in　Carson　City；　Nevada；
in　the　early　days。　　I　had　not　seen　her　or　heard　of　her　for　twenty　years；
I　had　not　been　thinking　about　her；　there　was　nothing　to　suggest　her　to
me；　nothing　to　bring　her　to　my　mind；　in　fact；　to　me　she　had　long　ago
ceased　to　exist；　and　had　disappeared　from　my　consciousness。　　But　I　knew
her　instantly；　and　I　saw　her　so　clearly　that　I　was　able　to　note　some　of
the　particulars　of　her　dress；　and　did　note　them；　and　they　remained　in　my
mind。　　I　was　impatient　for　her　to　come。　　In　the　midst　of　the　hand…
shakings　I　snatched　glimpses　of　her　and　noted　her　progress　with　the　slow…
moving　file　across　the　end　of　the　room；　then　I　saw　her　start　up　the　side；
and　this　gave　me　a　full　front　view　of　her　face。　　I　saw　her　last　when　she
was　within　twenty…five　feet　of　me。　　For　an　hour　I　kept　thinking　she　must
still　be　in　the　room　somewhere　and　would　come　at　last；　but　I　was
disappointed。

When　I　arrived　in　the　lecture…hall　that　evening　some　one　said：　〃Come　into
the　waiting…room；　there's　a　friend　of　yours　there　who　wants　to　see　you。
You'll　not　be　introducedyou　are　to　do　the　recognizing　without　help　if
you　can。〃

I　said　to　myself：　〃It　is　Mrs。　R。；　I　shan't　have　any　trouble。〃

There　were　perhaps　ten　ladies　present；　all　seated。　　In　the　midst　of　them
was　Mrs。　R。；　as　I　had　expected。　　She　was　dressed　exactly　as　she　was　when
I　had　seen　her　in　the　afternoon。　　I　went　forward　and　shook　hands　with　her
and　called　her　by　name；　and　said：

〃I　knew　you　the　moment　you　appeared　at　the　reception　this　afternoon。〃
She　looked　surprised；　and　said：　〃But　I　was　not　at　the　reception。　　I　have
just　arrived　from　Quebec；　and　have　not　been　in　town　an　hour。〃

It　was　my　turn　to　be　surprised　now。　　I　said：　〃I　can't　help　it。　　I　give
you　my　word　of　honor　that　it　is　as　I　say。　　I　saw　you　at　the　reception；
and　you　were　dressed　precisely　as　you　are　now。　　When　they　told　me　a
moment　ago　that　I　should　find　a　friend　in　this　room；　your　image　rose
before　me；　dress　and　all；　just　as　I　had　seen　you　at　the　reception。〃

Those　are　the　facts。　　She　was　not　at　the　reception　at　all；　or　anywhere
near　it；　but　I　saw　her　there　nevertheless；　and　most　clearly　and
unmistakably。　　To　that　I　could　make　oath。　　How　is　one　to　explain　this？　　I
was　not　thinking　of　her　at　the　time；　had　not　thought　of　her　for　years。
But　she　had　been　thinking　of　me；　no　doubt；　did　her　thoughts　flit　through
leagues　of　air　to　me；　and　bring　with　it　that　clear　and　pleasant　vision　of
herself？　　I　think　so。　　That　was　and　remains　my　sole　experience　in　the
matter　of　apparitionsI　mean　apparitions　that　come　when　one　is
（ostensibly）　awake。　　I　could　have　been　asleep　for　a　moment；　the
apparition　could　have　been　the　creature　of　a　dream。　　Still；　that　is
nothing　to　the　point；　the　feature　of　interest　is　the　happening　of　the
thing　just　at　that　time；　instead　of　at　an　earlier　or　later　time；　which　is
argument　that　its　origin　lay　in　thought…transference。

My　next　incident　will　be　set　aside　by　most　persons　as　being　merely
a　〃coincidence；〃　I　suppose。　　Years　ago　I　used　to　think　sometimes　of
making　a　lecturing　trip　through　the　antipodes　and　the　borders　of　the
Orient；　but　always　gave　up　the　idea；　partly　because　of　the　great　length
of　the　journey　and　partly　because　my　wife　could　not　well　manage　to　go
with　me。　　Towards　the　end　of　last　January　that　idea；　after　an　interval　of
years；　came　suddenly　into　my　head　againforcefully；　too；　and　without　any
apparent　reason。　　Whence　came　it？　　What　suggested　it？　　I　will　touch　upon
that　presently。

I　was　at　that　time　where　I　am　nowin　Paris。　　I　wrote　at　once　to　Henry　M。
Stanley　（London）；　and　asked　him　some　questions　about　his　Australian
lecture　tour；　and　inquired　who　had　conducted　him　and　what　were　the　terms。
After　a　day　or　two　his　answer　came。　　It　began：

　　　　　　　　　　〃The　lecture　agent　for　Australia　and　New　Zealand　is　par
　　　　　　　　　　excellence　Mr。　　R。　S。　Smythe；　of　Melbourne。〃

He　added　his　itinerary；　terms；　sea　expenses；　and　some　other　matters；　and
advised　me　to　write　Mr。　Smythe；　which　I　didFebruary　3d。　　I　began　my
letter　by　saying　in　substance　that　while　he　did　not　know　me　personally　we
had　a　mutual　friend　in　Stanley；　and　that　would　answer　for　an
introduction。　　Then　I　proposed　my　trip；　and　asked　if　he　would　give　me　the
same　terms　which　he　had　given　Stanley。

I　mailed　my　letter　to　Mr。　Smythe　February　6th；　and　three　days　later　I　got
a　letter　from　the　selfsame　Smythe；　dated　Melbourne；　December　17th。　　I
would　as　soon　have　expected　to　get　a　letter　from　the　late　George
Washington。　　The　letter　began　somewhat　as　mine　to　him　had　begunwith　a
self…introduction：

　　　　　　　　　　DEAR　MR。　CLEMENS；It　is　so　long　since　Archibald　Forbes　and　I
　　　　　　　　　　spent　that　pleasant　afternoon　in　your　comfortable　house　at
　　　　　　　　　　Hartford　that　you　have　probably　quite　forgotten　the　occasion。〃

In　the　course　of　his　letter　this　occurs：

　　　　　　　　　　〃I　am　willing　to　give　you〃　＇here　be　named　the　terms　which　he
　　　　　　　　　　had　given　Stanley＇　〃for　an　antipodean　tour　to　last；　say；　three
　　　　　　　　　　months。〃

Here　was　the　single　essential　detail　of　my　letter　answered　three　days
after　I　had　mailed　my　inquiry。　　I　might　have　saved　myself　the　trouble　and
the　postageand　a　few　years　ago　I　would　have　done　that　very　thing；　for　I
would　have　argued　that　my　sudden　and　strong　impulse　to　write　and　ask　some
questions　of　a　stranger　on　the　under　side　of　the　globe　meant　that　the
impulse　came　from　that　stranger；　and　that　he　would　answer　my　questions　of
his　own　motion　if　I　would　let　him　alone。

Mr。　Smythe's　letter　probably　passed　under　my　nose　on　its　way　to　lose
three　weeks　traveling　to　America　and　back；　and　gave　me　a　whiff　of　its
contents　as　it　went　along。　　Letters　often　act　like　that。　　Instead　of　the
thought　coming　to　you　in　an　instant　from　Australia；　the　（apparently）
unsentient　letter　imparts　it　to　you　as　it　glides　invisibly　past　your
elbow　in　the　mail…bag。

Next　incident。　　In　the　following　monthMarchI　was　in　America。　　I　spent
a　Sunday　at　Irvington…on…the…Hudson　with　Mr。　John　Brisben　Walker；　of　the
Cosmopolitan　magazine。　　We　came　into　New　York　next　morning；　and　went　to
the　Century　Club　for　luncheon。　　He　said　some　praiseful　things　about　the
character　of　the　club　and　the　orderly　serenity　and　pleasantness　of　its
quarters；　and　asked　if　I　had　never　tried　to　acquire　membership　in　it。
I　said　I　had　not；　and　that　New　York　clubs　were　a　continuous　expense　to
the　country　members　without　being　of　frequent　use　or　benefit　to　them。

〃And　now　I've　got　an　idea！〃　said　I。　　〃There's　the　Lotosthe　first　New
York　club　I　was　ever　a　member　ofmy　very　earliest　love　in　that　line。
I　have　been　a　member　of　it　for　considerably　more　than　twenty　years；　yet
have　seldom　had　a　chance　to　look　in　and　see　the　boys。　　They　turn　gray　and
grow　old　while　I　am　not　watching。　　And　my　dues　go　on。　　I　am　going　to
Hartford　this　afternoon　for　a　day　or　two；　but　as　soon　as　I　get　back　I
will　go　to　John　Elderkin　very　privately　and　say：　'Remember　the　veteran
and　confer　distinction　upon　him；　for　the　sake　of　old　times。　　Make　me　an
honorary　member　and　abolish　the　tax。　　If　you　haven't　any　such　thing　as
honorary　membership；　all　the　bettercreate　it　for　my　honor　and　glory。'
That　would　be　a　great　thing；　I　will　go　to　John　Elderkin　as　soon　as　I　get
back　from　Hartford。〃

I　took　the　last　express　that　afternoon；　first　telegraphing　Mr。　F。　G。
Whitmore　to　come　and　see　me　next　day。　　When　he　came　he　asked：　〃Did　you
get　a　letter　from　Mr。　John　Elderkin；　secretary　of　the　Lotos　Club；　before
you　left　New　York？〃

〃Then　it　just　missed　you。　　If　I　had　known　you　were　coming　I　would　have
kept　it。　　It　is　beautiful；　and　will　make　you　proud。　　The　Board　of
Directors；　by　unanimous　vote；　have　made　you　a　life　member；　and　squelched
those　dues；　and；　you　are　to　be　on　hand　and　receive　your　distinction　on
the　night　of　the　30th；　which　is　the　twenty…fifth　anniversary　of　the
founding　of　the　club；　and　it　will　not　surprise　me　if　they　have　some　great
times　there。〃

What　put　the　honorary　membership　in　my　head　that　day　in　the　Century　Club？
for　I　had　never　thought　of　it　before。　　I　don't　know　what　brought　the
thought　to　me　at　that　particular　time　instead　of　earlier；　but　I　am　well
satisfied　that　it　originated　with　the　Board　of　Directors；　and　had　been　on
its　way　to　my　brain　through　the　air　ever　since　the　moment　that　saw　their
vote　recorded。

Another　incident。　　I　was　in　Hartford　two　or　three　days　as　a　guest　of　the
Rev。　Joseph　H。　Twichell。　　I　have　held　the　rank　of　Honorary　Uncle　to　his
children　for　a　quarter　of　a　century；　and　I　went　out　with　him　in　the
trolley…car　to　visit　one　of　my　nieces；　who　is　at　Miss　Porter's　famous
school　in　Farmington。　　The　distance　is　eight　or　nine　miles。　　On　the　way；
talking；　I　illustrated　something　with　an　anecdote。　　This　is　the　anecdote：

Two　years　and　a　half　ago　I　and　the　family　arrived　at　Milan　on　our　way　to
Rome；　and　stopped　at　the　Continental。　　After　dinner　I　went　below　and　took
a　seat　in　the　stone…paved　court；　where　the　customary　lemon…trees　stand　in
the　customary　tubs；　and　said　to　myself；　〃Now　this　is　comfort；　comfort　and
repose；　and　nobody　to　disturb　it；　I　do　not　know　anybody　in　Milan。〃

Then　a　young　gentleman　stepped　up　and　shook　hands；　which　damaged　my
theory。　　He　said；　in　substance：

〃You　won't　remember　me；　Mr。　Clemens；　but　I　remember　you　very　well。　　I　was
a　cadet　at　West　Point　when　you　and　Rev。　Joseph　H。　Twichell　came　there
some　years　ago　and　talked　to　us　on　a　Hundredth　Night。　　I　am　a　lieutenant
in　the　regular　army　now；　and　my　name　is　H。　　I　am　in　Europe；　all　alone；
for　a　modest　little　tour；　my　regiment　is　in　Arizona。〃

We　became　friendly　and　sociable；　and　in　the　course　of　the　talk　he　told　me
of　an　adventure　which　had　befallen　himabout　to　this　effect：

〃I　was　at　Bellagio；　stopping　at　the　big　hotel　there；　and　ten　days　ago　I
lost　my　letter　of　credit。　　I　did　not　know　what　in　the　world　to　do。　　I　was
a　stranger；　I　knew　no　one　in　Europe；　I　hadn't　a　penny　in　my　pocket；　I
couldn't　even　send　a　telegram　to　London　to　get　my　lost　letter　replaced；
my　hotel　bi