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第90章

the heir of redclyffe-第90章

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instant; much frightened at his paleness; but he spoke directly。  'Only 

a fit of giddinessit is going off;' and he raised himself; but was 

obliged to lie down again directly。



'You had better keep quiet' said she。  'Is it your headache?'



'It is aching;' said Guy; and she put her hand over it。



'How hot and throbbing!' said she。 ' You must have caught cold in that 

walk。  No; don't try to move; it is only making it worse。'



'I must go to Philip;' he answered; starting up; but this 

brought on such a sensation of dizziness and faintness; that he sunk 

back on the pillow。



'No; it is of no use to fight against it;' said Amy; as soon as he was 

a little better。  'Never mind Philip; I'll go to him。  You must keep 

quiet; and I will get you a cup of hot tea。'



As he lay still; she had the comfort of seeing him somewhat revived; 

but he listened to her persuasions not to attempt to move。  It was 

later than she had expected; and she found that breakfast was laid out 

in the next room。  She brought him some tea; but he did not seem 

inclined to lift his head to drink it; and begged her to go at once to 

Philip; fearing he must be thinking himself strangely forgotten; and 

giving her many directions about the way he liked to be waited on at 

breakfast。



Very much surprised was Philip to see her instead; of her husband; and 

greatly concerned to hear that Guy was not well。



'Over…fatigue;' said he。  'He could not but feel the effects of such 

long…continued exertion。'  Then; after an interval; during which he had 

begun breakfast; with many apologies for letting her wait on him; he 

said; with some breaks; 'Never was there such a nurse as he; Amy; I 

have felt much more than I can express; especially now。  You will never 

have to complain of my harsh judgment again!'



'It is too much for you to talk of these things;' said Amabel; moved by 

the trembling of his feeble voice; but too anxious to return to her 

husband to like to wait even to hear that Philip's opinion _had_ 

altered。  It required much self…command not to hurry; even by manner; 

her cousin's tardy; languid movements; but she had been well trained by 

Charles in waiting on sick breakfasts。



When at length she was able to escape; she found that Guy had 

undressed; and gone to bed again。  He said he was more comfortable; and 

desired her to go and take her own breakfast before coming back to him; 

and she obeyed as well as she could; but very soon was again with him。  

He looked flushed and oppressed; and when she put her cool hand across 

his forehead; she was frightened at the increased throbbing of his 

temples。



'Amy;' said he; looking steadily at her; 'this is the fever。'



Without answering; she drew his hand into hers; and felt his pulse; 

which did indeed plainly respond fever。  Each knew that the other was 

recollecting what he had said; on Sunday; of the doctor's prediction; 

and Amy knew he was thinking of death; but all that passed was a 

proposal to send at once for the French physician。  Amabel wrote her 

note with steadiness; derived from the very force of the shock。  She 

could not think; she did not know whether she feared or hoped。  To act 

from one moment to another was all she attempted; and it was well that 

her imagination did not open to be appalled at her own situationso 

young; alone with the charge of two sick men in a foreign country; her 

cousin; indeed; recovering; but helpless; and not even in a state to 

afford her counsel; her husband sickening for this frightful fever; and 

with more than ordinary cause for apprehension; even without the 

doctor's prophecy; when she thought of his slight frame; and excitable 

temperament; and that though never as yet tried by a day's illness; he 

certainly had more spirit than strength; while all the fatigue he had 

been undergoing was likely to tell upon him now。  She did not look 

forward; she did not look round; she did not hope or fear; she 

_trusted_; and did her best for each; as she was wanted; trying not to 

make herself useless to both; by showing that she wished to be in two 

places at once。



It was a day sufficiently distressing in itself had there been no 

further apprehension; for there was the restlessness of illness; 

working on a character too active and energetic to acquiesce without a 

trial in the certainty that there was no remedy for present discomfort。  

There was no impatience nor rebellion against the illness itself; but a 

wish to try one after another the things that had been effective in 

relieving Philip during his recovery。  At the same time; he could not 

bear that Amabel should do anything to tire herself; and was very 

anxious that Philip should not be neglected。  He tossed from one side 

to the other in burning oppression or cold chills; Amy saw him looking 

wistful; suggested something by way of alleviation; then found he had 

been wishing for it; but refraining from asking in order to spare her; 

and that he was sorry when she procured it。  Again and again this 

happened; she smoothed the coverings; and shook up the pillow: he would 

thank her; look at her anxiously; beg her not to exert herself; but 

soon grew restless; and the whole was repeated。



At last; as she was trying to arrange the coverings; he exclaimed;



'I see how it is。  This is impatience。  Now; I will not stir for an 

hour;' and as he made the resolution; he smiled at treating himself so 

like a child。  His power of self…restraint came to his aid; and long 

before the hour was over he had fallen asleep。



This was a relief; yet that oppressed; flushed; discomposed slumber; 

and heavy breathing only confirmed her fears that the fever had gained 

full possession of him。  She had not the heart to write such tidings; 

at least till the physician should have made them too certain; nor 

could she even bear to use the word 'feverish;' in her answers to the 

anxious inquiries Philip made whenever she went into his room; though 

when he averted his face with a heavy sigh; she knew his conclusion was 

the same as her own。



The opinion of the physician was the only thing wanting to bring home 

the certainty; and that fell on her like lead in the evening; with one 

comfort; however; that he thought it a less severe case than the former 

one。  It was a great relief; too; that there was no wandering of mind; 

only the extreme drowsiness and oppression; and when Guy was roused by 

the doctor's visit; he was as clear and collected as possible; making 

inquiries and remarks; and speaking in a particularly calm and quiet 

manner。  As soon as the doctor was gone; he looked up to Amabel; 

saying; with his own smile; only very dim;



'It would be of no use; and it would not be true; to say I had rather 

you did not nurse me。  The doctor hopes there is not much danger of 

infection; and it is too late for precautions。'



'I am very glad;' said Amy。



'But you must be wise; and not hurt yourself。  Will you promise me not 

to sit up?'



'It is very kind of you to tell me nothing worse;' said she; with a sad 

submissiveness。



He smiled again。  'I am very sorry for you;' he said; looking very 

tenderly at her。  'To have us both on your hands at once!  But it comes 

straight from Heaven; that is one comfort; and you made up your mind to 

such things when you took me。'



Sadness in his eye; a sweet smile on his lip; and serenity on his brow; 

joined with the fevered cheek; the air of lassitude; and the panting; 

oppressed breath; there was a strange; melancholy beauty about him; and 

while Amy felt an impulse of ardent; clinging affection to one so 

precious to her; there was joined with it a sort of awe and veneration 

for one who so spoke; looked; and felt。  She hung over him; and 

sprinkled him with Eau…de…Cologne; then as his hair teased him by 

falling into his eyes; he asked her to cut the front lock off。  There 

was something sad in doing this; for that 'tumble…down wave;' as 

Charlotte called it; was rather a favourite of Amy's; it always seemed 

to have so much sympathy with his moods; and it was as if parting with 

it was resigning him to a long illness。  However; it was too 

troublesome not to go; and he looked amused at the care with which she 

folded up the glossy; brown wave; and treasured it in her dressing…

case; then she read to him a few verses of a psalm; and he soon fell 

into another doze。



There was little more of event; day after day。  The fever never ran as 

high as in Philip's case; and there was no delirium。  There was almost 

constant torpor; but when for any short space he was thoroughly 

awakened; his mind was perfectly clear; though he spoke little; and 

then only on the subject immediately presented to him。  There he lay 

for one quiet hour after another; while Amy sat by him; with as little 

consciousness of time as he had himself; looking neither forward nor 

backward; only to the present; to give him drink; bathe his face and 

hands; arrange his pillows; or read or repeat some soothing verse。  It 

always was a surprise when meal times summoned her to attend to Philip; 

when she was asked for the letters for the post; when evening twilight 

gathered in; or when she had to leave the night…watch to Arnaud; and go 

to bed in the adjoining room。



This was a great trial; but he would not allow her to sit up; and her 

own sense showed her that if this was to be a long illness; it would 

not do to waste her strength。  She knew he was quiet at night; and her 

trustful temper so calmed and supported her; that she was able to 

sleep; and thus was not as liable to be overworked as might have been 

feared; and as Philip thought she must be。



She always appeared in his room with her sweet face mournful and 

anxious; but never ruffled; or with any air of haste or discomfiture; 

desirous as she was to return to her husband; for; though he frequently 

sent her to take care of herself or of Philip; she knew that while she 

was away he always grew more restless and uncomfortable; and his look 

of relief at her re…entrance said as much to her as a hundred 

complaints of her absence would have done。



Philip was in the meantime sorely tried by being forced to be entirely 

inactive and dependent; while he saw Amabel in such need of assistance; 

and so far from being able to requite Guy's care; he could only look on 

himself as the cause of their distress; and an addition to ita 

burthen instead of a help。  If he had been told a little while ago what 

would be the present state of things; he would almost have laughed the 

speaker to scorn。 He would never have thought a child as competent as 

Amy to the sole management of two sick persons; and he not able either 

to advise or cheer her。  Yet he could not see anything went wrong that 

depended on her。  His comforts were so cared for; tha

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