the lily of the valley(幽谷百合)-第9章

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conviction　in　his　mind；　his　exile　was　a　long　and　miserable　period　of
idleness。　When　the　army　of　Conde；　which　his　courage　led　him　to　join
with　the　utmost　devotion；　was　disbanded；　he　expected　to　find　some
other　post　under　the　white　flag；　and　never　sought；　like　other
emigrants；　to　take　up　an　industry。　Perhaps　he　had　not　the　sort　of
courage　that　could　lay　aside　his　name　and　earn　his　living　in　the　sweat
of　a　toil　he　despised。　His　hopes；　daily　postponed　to　the　morrow；　and
possibly　a　scruple　of　honor；　kept　him　from　offering　his　services　to
foreign　powers。　Trials　undermined　his　courage。　Long　tramps　afoot　on
insufficient　nourishment；　and　above　all；　on　hopes　betrayed；　injured
his　health　and　discouraged　his　mind。　By　degrees　he　became　utterly
destitute。　If　to　some　men　misery　is　a　tonic；　on　others　it　acts　as　a
dissolvent；　and　the　count　was　of　the　latter。

Reflecting　on　the　life　of　this　poor　Touraine　gentleman；　tramping　and
sleeping　along　the　highroads　of　Hungary；　sharing　the　mutton　of　Prince
Esterhazy's　shepherds；　from　whom　the　foot…worn　traveller　begged　the
food　he　would　not；　as　a　gentleman；　have　accepted　at　the　table　of　the
master；　and　refusing　again　and　again　to　do　service　to　the　enemies　of
France；　I　never　found　it　in　my　heart　to　feel　bitterness　against　him；
even　when　I　saw　him　at　his　worst　in　after　days。　The　natural　gaiety　of
a　Frenchman　and　a　Tourangean　soon　deserted　him；　he　became　morose；　fell
ill；　and　was　charitably　cared　for　in　some　German　hospital。　His　disease
was　an　inflammation　of　the　mesenteric　membrane；　which　is　often　fatal；
and　is　liable；　even　if　cured；　to　change　the　constitution　and　produce
hypochondria。　His　love　affairs；　carefully　buried　out　of　sight　and
which　I　alone　discovered；　were　low…lived；　and　not　only　destroyed　his
health　but　ruined　his　future。

After　twelve　years　of　great　misery　he　made　his　way　to　France；　under
the　decree　of　the　Emperor　which　permitted　the　return　of　the　emigrants。
As　the　wretched　wayfarer　crossed　the　Rhine　and　saw　the　tower　of
Strasburg　against　the　evening　sky；　his　strength　gave　way。　〃'France！
France！'　I　cried。　'I　see　France！'〃　（he　said　to　me）　〃as　a　child　cries
'Mother！'　when　it　is　hurt。〃　Born　to　wealth；　he　was　now　poor；　made　to
command　a　regiment　or　govern　a　province；　he　was　now　without　authority
and　without　a　future；　constitutionally　healthy　and　robust；　he　returned
infirm　and　utterly　worn　out。　Without　enough　education　to　take　part
among　men　and　affairs；　now　broadened　and　enlarged　by　the　march　of
events；　necessarily　without　influence　of　any　kind；　he　lived　despoiled
of　everything；　of　his　moral　strength　as　well　as　his　physical。　Want　of
money　made　his　name　a　burden。　His　unalterable　opinions；　his
antecedents　with　the　army　of　Conde；　his　trials；　his　recollections；　his
wasted　health；　gave　him　susceptibilities　which　are　but　little　spared
in　France；　that　land　of　jest　and　sarcasm。　Half　dead　he　reached　Maine；
where；　by　some　accident　of　the　civil　war；　the　revolutionary　government
had　forgotten　to　sell　one　of　his　farms　of　considerable　extent；　which
his　farmer　had　held　for　him　by　giving　out　that　he　himself　was　the
owner　of　it。

When　the　Lenoncourt　family；　living　at　Givry；　an　estate　not　far　from
this　farm；　heard　of　the　arrival　of　the　Comte　de　Mortsauf；　the　Duc　de
Lenoncourt　invited　him　to　stay　at　Givry　while　a　house　was　being
prepared　for　him。　The　Lenoncourt　family　were　nobly　generous　to　him；
and　with　them　he　remained　some　months；　struggling　to　hide　his
sufferings　during　that　first　period　of　rest。　The　Lenoncourts　had
themselves　lost　an　immense　property。　By　birth　Monsieur　de　Mortsauf　was
a　suitable　husband　for　their　daughter。　Mademoiselle　de　Lenoncourt；
instead　of　rejecting　a　marriage　with　a　feeble　and　worn…out　man　of
thirty…five；　seemed　satisfied　to　accept　it。　It　gave　her　the
opportunity　of　living　with　her　aunt；　the　Duchesse　de　Verneuil；　sister
of　the　Prince　de　Blamont…Chauvry；　who　was　like　a　mother　to　her。

Madame　de　Verneuil；　the　intimate　friend　of　the　Duchesse　de　Bourbon；
was　a　member　of　the　devout　society　of　which　Monsieur　Saint…Martin
（born　in　Touraine　and　called　the　Philosopher　of　Mystery）　was　the　soul。
The　disciples　of　this　philosopher　practised　the　virtues　taught　them　by
the　lofty　doctrines　of　mystical　illumination。　These　doctrines　hold　the
key　to　worlds　divine；　they　explain　existence　by　reincarnations　through
which　the　human　spirit　rises　to　its　sublime　destiny；　they　liberate
duty　from　its　legal　degradation；　enable　the　soul　to　meet　the　trials　of
life　with　the　unalterable　serenity　of　the　Quaker；　ordain　contempt　for
the　sufferings　of　this　life；　and　inspire　a　fostering　care　of　that
angel　within　us　who　allies　us　to　the　divine。　It　is　stoicism　with　an
immortal　future。　Active　prayer　and　pure　love　are　the　elements　of　this
faith；　which　is　born　of　the　Roman　Church　but　returns　to　the
Christianity　of　the　primitive　faith。　Mademoiselle　de　Lenoncourt
remained；　however；　in　the　Catholic　communion；　to　which　her　aunt　was
equally　bound。　Cruelly　tried　by　revolutionary　horrors；　the　Duchesse　de
Verneuil　acquired　in　the　last　years　of　her　life　a　halo　of　passionate
piety；　which；　to　use　the　phraseology　of　Saint…Martin；　shed　the　light
of　celestial　love　and　the　chrism　of　inward　joy　upon　the　soul　of　her
cherished　niece。

After　the　death　of　her　aunt；　Madame　de　Mortsauf　received　several
visits　at　Clochegourde　from　Saint…Martin；　a　man　of　peace　and　of
virtuous　wisdom。　It　was　at　Clochegourde　that　he　corrected　his　last
books；　printed　at　Tours　by　Letourmy。　Madame　de　Verneuil；　wise　with　the
wisdom　of　an　old　woman　who　has　known　the　stormy　straits　of　life；　gave
Clochegourde　to　the　young　wife　for　her　married　home；　and　with　the
grace　of　old　age；　so　perfect　where　it　exists；　the　duchess　yielded
everything　to　her　niece；　reserving　for　herself　only　one　room　above　the
one　she　had　always　occupied；　and　which　she　now　fitted　up　for　the
countess。　Her　sudden　death　threw　a　gloom　over　the　early　days　of　the
marriage；　and　connected　Clochegourde　with　ideas　of　sadness　in　the
sensitive　mind　of　the　bride。　The　first　period　of　her　settlement　in
Touraine　was　to　Madame　de　Mortsauf；　I　cannot　say　the　happiest；　but　the
least　troubled　of　her　life。

After　the　many　trials　of　his　exile；　Monsieur　de　Mortsauf；　taking
comfort　in　the　thought　of　a　secure　future；　had　a　certain　recovery　of
mind；　he　breathed　anew　in　this　sweet　valley　the　intoxicating　essence
of　revived　hope。　Compelled　to　husband　his　means；　he　threw　himself　into
agricultural　pursuits　and　began　to　find　some　happiness　in　life。　But
the　birth　of　his　first　child；　Jacques；　was　a　thunderbolt　which　ruined
both　the　past　and　the　future。　The　doctor　declared　the　child　had　not
vitality　enough　to　live。　The　count　concealed　this　sentence　from　the
mother；　but　he　sought　other　advice；　and　received　the　same　fatal
answer；　the　truth　of　which　was　confirmed　at　the　subsequent　birth　of
Madeleine。　These　events　and　a　certain　inward　consciousness　of　the
cause　of　this　disaster　increased　the　diseased　tendencies　of　the　man
himself。　His　name　doomed　to　extinction；　a　pure　and　irreproachable
young　woman　made　miserable　beside　him　and　doomed　to　the　anguish　of
maternity　without　its　joysthis　uprising　of　his　former　into　his
present　life；　with　its　growth　of　new　sufferings；　crushed　his　spirit

and　completed　its　destruction。

The　countess　guessed　the　past　from　the　present；　and　read　the　future。
Though　nothing　is　so　difficult　as　to　make　a　man　happy　when　he　knows
himself　to　blame；　she　set　herself　to　that　task；　which　is　worthy　of　an
angel。　She　became　stoical。　Descending　into　an　abyss；　whence　she　still
could　see　the　sky；　she　devoted　herself　to　the　care　of　one　man　as　the
sister　of　charity　devotes　herself　to　many。　To　reconcile　him　with
himself；　she　forgave　him　that　for　which　he　had　no　forgiveness。　The
count　grew　miserly；　she　accepted　the　privations　he　imposed。　Like　all
who　have　known　the　world　only　to　acquire　its　suspiciousness；　he　feared
betrayal；　she　lived　in　solitude　and　yielded　without　a　murmur　to　his
mistrust。　With　a　woman's　tact　she　made　him　will　to　do　that　which　was
right；　till　he　fancied　the　ideas　were　his　own；　and　thus　enjoyed　in　his
own　person　the　honors　of　a　superiority　that　was　never　his。　After　due
experience　of　married　life；　she　came　to　the　resolution　of　never
leaving　Clochegourde；　for　she　saw　the　hysterical　tendencies　of　the
count's　nature；　and　feared　the　outbreaks　which　might　be　talked　of　in
that　gossipping　and　jealous　neighborhood　to　the　injury　of　her
children。　Thus；　thanks　to　her；　no　one　suspected　Monsieur　de　Mortsauf's
real　incapacity；　for　she　wrapped　his　ruins　in　a　mantle　of　ivy。　The
fickle；　not　merely　discontented　but　embittered　nature　of　the　man　found
rest　and　ease　in　his　wife；　his　secret　anguish　was　lessened　by　the　balm
she　shed　upon　it。

This　brief　history　is　in　part　a　summary　of　that　forced　from　Monsieur
de　Chessel　by　his　inward　vexation。　His　knowledge　of　the　world　enabled
him　to　penetrate　several　of　the　mysteries　of　Clochegourde。　But　the
prescience　of　love　could　not　be　misled　by　the　sublime　attitude　with
which　Madame　de　Mortsauf　deceived　the　world。　When　alone　in　my　little
bedroom；　a　sense　of　the　full　truth　made　me　spring　from　my　bed；　I　could
not　bear　to　stay　at　Frapesle　when　I　saw　the　lighted　windows　of
Clochegourde。　I　dressed；　went　softly　down；　and　left　the　chateau　by　the
door　of　a　tower　at　the　foot　of　a　winding　stairway。　The　coolness　of　the
night　calmed　me。　I　crossed　the　Indre　by　the　bridge　at　the　Red　Mill；
took　the　ever…blessed　punt；　and　rowed　in　front　of　Clochegourde；　where
a　brilliant　light　was　streaming　from　a　window　looking　towards　Azay。

Again　I　plunged　into　my　old　meditations；　but　they　were　now　peaceful；
intermingled　with　the　love…note　of　the　nightingale　and　the　solitary
cry　of　the　sedge…warbler。　Ideas　glided　like　fairies　through　my　mind；
lifting　the　black　veil　which　had　hidden　till　then　the　glorious　future。
Soul　and　senses　were　alike　charmed。　With　what　passion　my　thoughts　rose
to　her！　Again　and　again　I　cried；　with　the　repetition　of　a　madman；
〃Will　she　be　mine？〃　During　the　preceding　days　the　universe　had
enlarged　to　me；　but　now　in　a　single　night　I　found　its　centre。　On　her
my　will　and　my　ambition　henceforth　fastened；　I　desired　to　be　all　in
all　to　her；　that　I　might　heal　and　fill　her　lacerated　heart。

Beautiful　was　that　night　beneath　her　windows；　amid　the　murmur　of
waters　rippling　through　the　sluices；　broken　only　by　a　voice　that　told
the　hours　from　the　clock…tower　of　Sache。　During　those　hours　of
darkness　bathed　in　light；　when　this　sidereal　flower　illumined　my
existence；　I　betrothed　to　her　my　soul　with　the　faith　of　the　poor
Castilian　knight　whom　we　laugh　at　in　the　pages　of　Cervantes；a　faith；
nevertheless；　with　which　all　love　begins。

At　the　first　gleam　of　day；　the　first　note　of　the　waking　birds；　I　fled
back　among　the　trees　of　Frapesle　and　reached　the　house；　no　one　had
seen　me；　no　one　suspected　by　absence；　and　I　slept　soundly　until　the
bell　rang　for　breakfast。　When　the　meal　was　over　I　went　down；　in　spite
of　the　heat；　to　the　meadow…lands　for　another　sight　of　the　Indre　and
its　isles；　the　valley　and　its　slopes；　of　which　I　seemed　so　passionate
an　admirer。　But　once　there；　thanks　to　a　swiftness　of　foot　like　that　of
a　loose　horse；　I　returned　to　my　punt；　the　willows；　and　Clochegourde。
All　w