roughing it-第63章

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him　God…speed　in　his　going。　　From　that　time　forth；　whenever　his　ship　was
signaled　in　the　offing；　or　he　catted　his　anchor　and　stood　out　to　sea；
that　ensign　streamed　from　the　royal　halliards　on　the　parliament　house　and
the　nation　lifted　their　hats　to　it　with　spontaneous　accord。

Yet　he　had　never　fired　a　gun　or　fought　a　battle　in　his　life。　　When　I　knew
him　on　board　the　Ajax；　he　was　seventy…two　years　old　and　had　plowed　the
salt　water　sixty…one　of　them。　　For　sixteen　years　he　had　gone　in　and　out
of　the　harbor　of　Honolulu　in　command　of　a　whaleship；　and　for　sixteen　more
had　been　captain　of　a　San　Francisco　and　Sandwich　Island　passenger　packet
and　had　never　had　an　accident　or　lost　a　vessel。　　The　simple　natives　knew
him　for　a　friend　who　never　failed　them；　and　regarded　him　as　children
regard　a　father。　　It　was　a　dangerous　thing　to　oppress　them　when　the
roaring　Admiral　was　around。

Two　years　before　I　knew　the　Admiral；　he　had　retired　from　the　sea　on　a
competence；　and　had　sworn　a　colossal　nine…jointed　oath　that　he　would
〃never　go　within　smelling　distance　of　the　salt　water　again　as　long　as　he
lived。〃　　And　he　had　conscientiously　kept　it。　　That　is　to　say；　he
considered　he　had　kept　it；　and　it　would　have　been　more　than　dangerous　to
suggest　to　him；　even　in　the　gentlest　way；　that　making　eleven　long　sea
voyages；　as　a　passenger；　during　the　two　years　that　had　transpired　since
he　〃retired；〃　was　only　keeping　the　general　spirit　of　it　and　not　the
strict　letter。

The　Admiral　knew　only　one　narrow　line　of　conduct　to　pursue　in　any　and　all
cases　where　there　was　a　fight；　and　that　was　to　shoulder　his　way　straight
in　without　an　inquiry　as　to　the　rights　or　the　merits　of　it；　and　take　the
part　of　the　weaker　side。And　this　was　the　reason　why　he　was　always　sure
to　be　present　at　the　trial　of　any　universally　execrated　criminal　to
oppress　and　intimidate　the　jury　with　a　vindictive　pantomime　of　what　he
would　do　to　them　if　he　ever　caught　them　out　of　the　box。　　And　this　was　why
harried　cats　and　outlawed　dogs　that　knew　him　confidently　took　sanctuary
under　his　chair　in　time　of　trouble。　　In　the　beginning　he　was　the　most
frantic　and　bloodthirsty　Union　man　that　drew　breath　in　the　shadow　of　the
Flag；　but　the　instant　the　Southerners　began　to　go　down　before　the　sweep
of　the　Northern　armies；　he　ran　up　the　Confederate　colors　and　from　that
time　till　the　end　was　a　rampant　and　inexorable　secessionist。

He　hated　intemperance　with　a　more　uncompromising　animosity　than　any
individual　I　have　ever　met；　of　either　sex；　and　he　was　never　tired　of
storming　against　it　and　beseeching　friends　and　strangers　alike　to　be　wary
and　drink　with　moderation。　　And　yet　if　any　creature　had　been　guileless
enough　to　intimate　that　his　absorbing　nine　gallons　of　〃straight〃　whiskey
during　our　voyage　was　any　fraction　short　of　rigid　or　inflexible
abstemiousness；　in　that　self…same　moment　the　old　man　would　have　spun　him
to　the　uttermost　parts　of　the　earth　in　the　whirlwind　of　his　wrath。　　Mind；
I　am　not　saying　his　whisky　ever　affected　his　head　or　his　legs；　for　it　did
not；　in　even　the　slightest　degree。　　He　was　a　capacious　container；　but　he
did　not　hold　enough　for　that。　　He　took　a　level　tumblerful　of　whisky　every
morning　before　he　put　his　clothes　on〃to　sweeten　his　bilgewater；〃　he
said。He　took　another　after　he　got　the　most　of　his　clothes　on；　〃to
settle　his　mind　and　give　him　his　bearings。〃　　He　then　shaved；　and　put　on　a
clean　shirt；　after　which　he　recited　the　Lord's　Prayer　in　a　fervent；
thundering　bass　that　shook　the　ship　to　her　kelson　and　suspended　all
conversation　in　the　main　cabin。　　Then；　at　this　stage；　being　invariably
〃by　the　head；〃　or　〃by　the　stern；〃　or　〃listed　to　port　or　starboard；〃　he
took　one　more　to　〃put　him　on　an　even　keel　so　that　he　would　mind　his
hellum　and　not　miss　stays　and　go　about；　every　time　he　came　up　in　the
wind。〃And　now；　his　state…room　door　swung　open　and　the　sun　of　his
benignant　face　beamed　redly　out　upon　men　and　women　and　children；　and　he
roared　his　〃Shipmets　a'hoy！〃　in　a　way　that　was　calculated　to　wake　the
dead　and　precipitate　the　final　resurrection；　and　forth　he　strode；　a
picture　to　look　at　and　a　presence　to　enforce　attention。　　Stalwart　and
portly；　not　a　gray　hair；　broadbrimmed　slouch　hat；　semi…sailor　toggery　of
blue　navy　flannelroomy　and　ample；　a　stately　expanse　of　shirt…front　and
a　liberal　amount　of　black　silk　neck…cloth　tied　with　a　sailor　knot；　large
chain　and　imposing　seals　impending　from　his　fob；　awe…inspiring　feet；　and
〃a　hand　like　the　hand　of　Providence；〃　as　his　whaling　brethren　expressed
it；　wrist…bands　and　sleeves　pushed　back　half　way　to　the　elbow；　out　of
respect　for　the　warm　weather；　and　exposing　hairy　arms；　gaudy　with　red　and
blue　anchors；　ships；　and　goddesses　of　liberty　tattooed　in　India　ink。
But　these　details　were　only　secondary　mattershis　face　was　the　lodestone
that　chained　the　eye。　　It　was　a　sultry　disk；　glowing　determinedly　out
through　a　weather　beaten　mask　of　mahogany；　and　studded　with　warts；　seamed
with　scars；　〃blazed〃　all　over　with　unfailing　fresh　slips　of　the　razor；
and　with　cheery　eyes；　under　shaggy　brows；　contemplating　the　world　from
over　the　back　of　a　gnarled　crag　of　a　nose　that　loomed　vast　and　lonely　out
of　the　undulating　immensity　that　spread　away　from　its　foundations。
At　his　heels　frisked　the　darling　of　his　bachelor　estate；　his　terrier
〃Fan；〃　a　creature　no　larger　than　a　squirrel。　　The　main　part　of　his　daily
life　was　occupied　in　looking　after　〃Fan；〃　in　a　motherly　way；　and
doctoring　her　for　a　hundred　ailments　which　existed　only　in　his
imagination。

The　Admiral　seldom　read　newspapers；　and　when　he　did　he　never　believed
anything　they　said。　　He　read　nothing；　and　believed　in　nothing；　but　〃The
Old　Guard；〃　a　secession　periodical　published　in　New　York。　　He　carried　a
dozen　copies　of　it　with　him；　always；　and　referred　to　them　for　all
required　information。　　If　it　was　not　there；　he　supplied　it　himself；　out
of　a　bountiful　fancy；　inventing　history；　names；　dates；　and　every　thing
else　necessary　to　make　his　point　good　in　an　argument。　　Consequently　he
was　a　formidable　antagonist　in　a　dispute。　　Whenever　he　swung　clear　of　the
record　and　began　to　create　history；　the　enemy　was　helpless　and　had　to
surrender。　　Indeed；　the　enemy　could　not　keep　from　betraying　some　little
spark　of　indignation　at　his　manufactured　historyand　when　it　came　to
indignation；　that　was　the　Admiral's　very　〃best　hold。〃　　He　was　always
ready　for　a　political　argument；　and　if　nobody　started　one　he　would　do　it
himself。　　With　his　third　retort　his　temper　would　begin　to　rise；　and
within　five　minutes　he　would　be　blowing　a　gale；　and　within　fifteen　his
smoking…room　audience　would　be　utterly　stormed　away　and　the　old　man　left
solitary　and　alone；　banging　the　table　with　his　fist；　kicking　the　chairs；
and　roaring　a　hurricane　of　profanity。　　It　got　so；　after　a　while；　that
whenever　the　Admiral　approached；　with　politics　in　his　eye；　the　passengers
would　drop　out　with　quiet　accord；　afraid　to　meet　him；　and　he　would　camp
on　a　deserted　field。

But　he　found　his　match　at　last；　and　before　a　full　company。　　At　one　time
or　another；　everybody　had　entered　the　lists　against　him　and　been　routed；
except　the　quiet　passenger　Williams。　　He　had　never　been　able　to　get　an
expression　of　opinion　out　of　him　on　politics。　　But　now；　just　as　the
Admiral　drew　near　the　door　and　the　company　were　about　to　slip　out；
Williams　said：

〃Admiral；　are　you　certain　about　that　circumstance　concerning　the
clergymen　you　mentioned　the　other　day？〃referring　to　a　piece　of　the
Admiral's　manufactured　history。

Every　one　was　amazed　at　the　man's　rashness。　　The　idea　of　deliberately
inviting　annihilation　was　a　thing　incomprehensible。　　The　retreat　came　to
a　halt；　then　everybody　sat　down　again　wondering；　to　await　the　upshot　of
it。　　The　Admiral　himself　was　as　surprised　as　any　one。　　He　paused　in　the
door；　with　his　red　handkerchief　half　raised　to　his　sweating　face；　and
contemplated　the　daring　reptile　in　the　corner。

〃Certain　of　it？　　Am　I　certain　of　it？　　Do　you　think　I've　been　lying　about
it？　　What　do　you　take　me　for？　　Anybody　that　don't　know　that　circumstance；
don't　know　anything；　a　child　ought　to　know　it。　　Read　up　your　history！
Read　it　up…；　and　don't　come　asking　a　man　if　he's　certain　about　a　bit
of　ABC　stuff　that　the　very　southern　niggers　know　all　about。〃

Here　the　Admiral's　fires　began　to　wax　hot；　the　atmosphere　thickened；　the
coming　earthquake　rumbled；　he　began　to　thunder　and　lighten。　　Within　three
minutes　his　volcano　was　in　full　irruption　and　he　was　discharging　flames
and　ashes　of　indignation；　belching　black　volumes　of　foul　history　aloft；
and　vomiting　red…hot　torrents　of　profanity　from　his　crater。　　Meantime
Williams　sat　silent；　and　apparently　deeply　and　earnestly　interested　in
what　the　old　man　was　saying。　　By　and　by；　when　the　lull　came；　he　said　in
the　most　deferential　way；　and　with　the　gratified　air　of　a　man　who　has　had
a　mystery　cleared　up　which　had　been　puzzling　him　uncomfortably：

〃Now　I　understand　it。　　I　always　thought　I　knew　that　piece　of　history　well
enough；　but　was　still　afraid　to　trust　it；　because　there　was　not　that
convincing　particularity　about　it　that　one　likes　to　have　in　history；　but
when　you　mentioned　every　name；　the　other　day；　and　every　date；　and　every
little　circumstance；　in　their　just　order　and　sequence；　I　said　to　myself；
this　sounds　something　likethis　is　historythis　is　putting　it　in　a
shape　that　gives　a　man　confidence；　and　I　said　to　myself　afterward；　I　will
just　ask　the　Admiral　if　he　is　perfectly　certain　about　the　details；　and　if
he　is　I　will　come　out　and　thank　him　for　clearing　this　matter　up　for　me。
And　that　is　what　I　want　to　do　nowfor　until　you　set　that　matter　right　it
was　nothing　but　just　a　confusion　in　my　mind；　without　head　or　tail　to　it。〃

Nobody　ever　saw　the　Admiral　look　so　mollified　before；　and　so　pleased。
Nobody　had　ever　received　his　bogus　history　as　gospel　before；　its
genuineness　had　always　been　called　in　question　either　by　words　or　looks；
but　here　was　a　man　that　not　only　swallowed　it　all　down；　but　was　grateful
for　the　dose。　　He　was　taken　a　back；　he　hardly　knew　what　to　say；　even　his
profanity　failed　him。　　Now；　Williams　continued；　modestly　and　earnestly：

〃But　Admiral；　in　saying　that　this　was　the　first　stone　thrown；　and　that
this　precipitated　the　war；　you　have　overlooked　a　circumstance　which　you
are　perfectly　familiar　with；　but　which　has　escaped　your　memory。　　Now　I
grant　you　that　what　you　have　stated　is　correct　in　every　detailto　wit：
that　on　the　16th　of　October；　1860；　two　Massachusetts　clergymen；　named
Waite　and　Granger；　went　in　disguise　to　the　house　of　John　Moody；　in
Rockport；　at　dead　of　night；　and　dragged　forth　two　southern　women　and
their　two　little　children；　and　after　tarring　and　feathering　them　conveyed
them　to　Boston　and　burned　them　alive　in　the　State　House　square；　and　I
also　grant　your　proposition　that　this　deed　is　what　led　to　the　secession
of　South　Carolina　on　the　20th　of　December　following。　　Very　well。〃　　＇Here
the　company　were　pleasantly　surprised　to　hear　Williams　proceed　to　come
back　at　the　Admiral　with　his　own　invincible　weaponclean；　pure；
manufactured　history；　without　a　word　of　truth　in　it。＇　　〃Very　well；　I　say。
But　Admiral；　why　overlook　the　Willis　and　Morgan　case　in　South　Carolina？
You　are　too　well　informed　a　man　not　to　know　a